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I feel like I've advanced more spiritually in the last month then in the 2 years preceding it. For years I had plenty of alone time, but I kept putting off meditation while waiting for the "perfect" time, which of course never came. Living in a group home isn't ideal, there are plenty of people who seem to always be making noise, lol. But since resuming my program weeks ago, I haven't missed a single session. I no longer wait for the time that feels perfect, I make use of the time and space I currently have. Where there's a will, there's a way.

I continue to stay sober and work on the underlying issues related to addiction. It's certainly hard, as my brain is still recovering. But I am very grateful to have been given a second chance, and this beautiful community has been very helpful. I still worry sometimes about how to fix my life, I'm not sure what I should do career wise. But I know I love the Gods and Goddesses, and I love our amazing Temple. I am in a much better place then I was a few months ago, when I was still in active addiction and burying my true feelings in drugs. Thank you to all who help maintain and build up this wonderful Place.
Forores [NG]
Forores [NG]
Everyone can fall, as there are many pits, but few can get out of them and rise. We are here to help each others in case of need.

It's important that you managed to detach from that addiction and turn back to the path. May the Gods bless you and keep you strong.

Also, you should do some more detaching workings combined with positive ones to keep you on track.
Arcadia [NG]
Arcadia [NG]
Overcoming addiction is incredibly difficult. There will be plenty of bumps in the road, you would know that better than anyone, but it's important to remember that every day clean is a victory in and of itself, and no one day is like another. Many who undertake never manage to last as long as you have already, and that shows real strength of character.

Never forget that people here will listen to your problems so long as you're willing to speak about them. The only other thing I can say is, it's only natural you will have concerns about your future, but for the time being, you can really only do yourself favors by focusing on the now. Pursue hobbies, spend time with people who have your best interests in mind, find all the reasons you can to recover, beyond the merit of the act itself. The Temple will still be here tomorrow, and you can be a part of it if you wish it to be.

Good luck on the road ahead, brother.
K
Kingfisher
Thank you all for your support! I am very blessed to be a Zevist.
When I performed the Great Ritual of Zeus, I had a vision afterward
I focused on my third eye and saw images begin to shift and change in the following order
At first, it was a peacock with colorful wings, white swan, seven-headed serpent emerging from the bottom of my spine (1st chackra?) And then a bee with white butterfly wings
I still don't know how to fully interpret these signs, hope i gonna figure it out soon, if anyone has any suggestions you're welcome to share
I wanted to write these tidbits about my new name, since I know a couple people were curious.

On its origins, it came to me in a dream. Nothing grand or mysterious, I was literally just scrolling the Forums and answering a couple questions (...in a dream), and the username I had was Khemenu Nefermed.
I had thought of changing my name to something more personally meaningful before that, and the three fragments of this name are words I didn't, at least to my knowledge, know of before this dream.
So I meditated on the name, and felt a deep connection to it, elaborated a bit on it, and out came Khem Nefermed.

It has layers of meaning, some of which are too personal to share, but I will share the biggest part of it.

The name can roughly translate to "Khem, of beautiful speech."

Nefer-medu means beautiful-word, and it relates to my passion for writing and the oratory arts in general. It obviously also relates to Lord Thoth.

Khem itself I didn't translate above, because it has a triple meaning in terms of what it means to me.

Firstly, the biggest meaning is that it is short for Khemenu or Khemenew. This means "The Eight", "the Ogdoad", and it relates to the eight primordial deities of Egypt, worshipped in the city of the same name.
This city was later called Hermopolis Magna, or the Great City of Hermes, because it was the largest cult of Thoth.

Secondly, it relates to Kemet, Egypt itself. I have many pagan cultures I am fascinated with and attracted to, but Egypt has been with me my entire life, down to my early childhood.

Thirdly, it relates to Khem itself, which means "dark", in the sense of fertility. Months before this, I had a dream of a deity I could not make sense of, because it wasn't well known. It was Min, the Egyptian God of reproduction and fertility. This is a God I was close to in ways I didn't know until I researched it deeper. Khem as "fertile" (a reference to darker soil) is an epithet of many Gods, including Min.

Yes, the fact that Khem has three meanings is also an intentional nod to Hermes Trismegistus. The name is quite connected to Hermes/Thoth, and I hope to honor Him in the work I do.

The name can translate to, if we take all of these meanings, "Fruitful one of the Ogdoad, of good words, the Egyptian".

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