missed days and repressed memories

[[email protected]]

I'm sorry for the length of this, but please read it through. I seriously need some answers.

Hi, everyone! Firstly, I wanna apologize. I don't often get to post here anymore because of work, so I'm sorry for not contributing a whole lot. There's that and I don't have WiFi at home. I literally have to go to restaurants and stuff to get WiFi from my phone, and I just today figured out how to post from my phone. But I've been following along with the groups best I can.

Now, onto my questions. For awhile, I was in not the best if relationships and I got depressed. Nightshift was also extremely exhausting for me. But I was stupid enough to stop meditating, so I missed some days, and for awhile I was on again and off again with meditation and yoga. My momentum had been screwed up now, no doubt, but I've been slowly building back to what I used to do. So far, I'm doing meditation and hatha yoga during the day, and I'm working on implementing the night meditation and kundalini yoga back into my regular schedule. I'm trying not to do it all at once because I tried that before and it took a lot out of me, so I'm slowly but surely rebuilding my momentum. My question is, is it bad that instead of restarting the 40 day program I picked up where I used to be with breathing exercises, yoga, meditation, etc? Is that damaging for my soul? It doesn't seem like it's harmful so far; my energy buzzes are getting stronger and stronger by the day like they used to. But I just need confirmation that I'm not doing something harmful.

As for my second question, when I left that bad relationship, I got with another person. That person was the first person I ever had sex with, but as we were doing it I recognized the feeling of being inside someone. It physically felt so familiar, and almost immediately after I realized this, I thought of my "mother". I don't know how to explain it, but I felt dirty and had a feeling that she had sex with me. I put mother in quotes because she was very abusive and not a mother at all to me. But still, I don't remember anything like that. I have no clear memories of childhood rape. I remember emotional and physical abuse from her and my "father", and sexual abuse from his girlfriend, but I don't have any explicit memories of being raped.. Is there any meditation I can do to see the past? I want to know if this is real or not. I feel like I'm crazy sometimes. I say to myself, "there's no way even she wouldve done that", but then I have doubts, and then if I try to say "maybe she did do it", I second guess myself and I think "or maybe you're crazy and you imagined it all". I'm so sick of not knowing. Could vibrating Wunjo help with this, or is there a more effective way of verifying whether these memories are real or false?

 

[alpha one]

I am deeply sorry for your harsh childhood and wish you good luck on ur journey to overcome all this. To look into the past i would suggest doing the past life regression meditation. If u have any psychological hangups then kindly do the following meditation ....vibrate wunjo rune any number of times...multiples of nine ...after that affirm ' the engeries of wunjo are totally and completely healing me from any and all psychological mental and emotional damage and pain '

Sent from Yahoo Mail on Android

On Tue, 7 Nov 2017 at 17:19, wrenthewolfie@... [JoyofSatan666]<[email protected] wrote:   I'm sorry for the length of this, but please read it through. I seriously need some answers.

Hi, everyone! Firstly, I wanna apologize. I don't often get to post here anymore because of work, so I'm sorry for not contributing a whole lot. There's that and I don't have WiFi at home. I literally have to go to restaurants and stuff to get WiFi from my phone, and I just today figured out how to post from my phone. But I've been following along with the groups best I can.

Now, onto my questions. For awhile, I was in not the best if relationships and I got depressed. Nightshift was also extremely exhausting for me. But I was stupid enough to stop meditating, so I missed some days, and for awhile I was on again and off again with meditation and yoga. My momentum had been screwed up now, no doubt, but I've been slowly building back to what I used to do. So far, I'm doing meditation and hatha yoga during the day, and I'm working on implementing the night meditation and kundalini yoga back into my regular schedule. I'm trying not to do it all at once because I tried that before and it took a lot out of me, so I'm slowly but surely rebuilding my momentum. My question is, is it bad that instead of restarting the 40 day program I picked up where I used to be with breathing exercises, yoga, meditation, etc? Is that damaging for my soul? It doesn't seem like it's harmful so far; my energy buzzes are getting stronger and stronger by the day like they used to. But I just need confirmation that I'm not doing something harmful.

As for my second question, when I left that bad relationship, I got with another person. That person was the first person I ever had sex with, but as we were doing it I recognized the feeling of being inside someone. It physically felt so familiar, and almost immediately after I realized this, I thought of my "mother". I don't know how to explain it, but I felt dirty and had a feeling that she had sex with me. I put mother in quotes because she was very abusive and not a mother at all to me. But still, I don't remember anything like that. I have no clear memories of childhood rape. I remember emotional and physical abuse from her and my "father", and sexual abuse from his girlfriend, but I don't have any explicit memories of being raped.. Is there any meditation I can do to see the past? I want to know if this is real or not. I feel like I'm crazy sometimes. I say to myself, "there's no way even she wouldve done that", but then I have doubts, and then if I try to say "maybe she did do it", I second guess myself and I think "or maybe you're crazy and you imagined it all". I'm so sick of not knowing. Could vibrating Wunjo help with this, or is there a more effective way of verifying whether these memories are real or false?

 

[Gerecht Ror1]

<head/>To my experience, you might be projecting your mother figure into that woman. Maybe she has someting in common with your mother, can be something thin or non evident that is creating an association on the unonscious level.

Another possibility is you did not cut Astral ties with your mother so possibly her mind is opposed to your new relationship and influencing your thoughts.
Last you may be experiencing a Pluto transit to your Moon.

On 11/07/2017, 02:58 "wrenthewolfie@... [JoyofSatan666]" <[email protected] wrote:

  I&apos;m sorry for the length of this, but please read it through. I seriously need some answers.

Hi, everyone! Firstly, I wanna apologize. I don&apos;t often get to post here anymore because of work, so I&apos;m sorry for not contributing a whole lot. There&apos;s that and I don&apos;t have WiFi at home. I literally have to go to restaurants and stuff to get WiFi from my phone, and I just today figured out how to post from my phone. But I&apos;ve been following along with the groups best I can.

Now, onto my questions. For awhile, I was in not the best if relationships and I got depressed. Nightshift was also extremely exhausting for me. But I was stupid enough to stop meditating, so I missed some days, and for awhile I was on again and off again with meditation and yoga. My momentum had been screwed up now, no doubt, but I&apos;ve been slowly building back to what I used to do. So far, I&apos;m doing meditation and hatha yoga during the day, and I&apos;m working on implementing the night meditation and kundalini yoga back into my regular schedule. I&apos;m trying not to do it all at once because I tried that before and it took a lot out of me, so I&apos;m slowly but surely rebuilding my momentum. My question is, is it bad that instead of restarting the 40 day program I picked up where I used to be with breathing exercises, yoga, meditation, etc? Is that damaging for my soul? It doesn&apos;t seem like it&apos;s harmful so far; my energy buzzes are getting stronger and stronger by the day like they used to. But I just need confirmation that I&apos;m not doing something harmful.

As for my second question, when I left that bad relationship, I got with another person. That person was the first person I ever had sex with, but as we were doing it I recognized the feeling of being inside someone. It physically felt so familiar, and almost immediately after I realized this, I thought of my "mother". I don&apos;t know how to explain it, but I felt dirty and had a feeling that she had sex with me. I put mother in quotes because she was very abusive and not a mother at all to me. But still, I don&apos;t remember anything like that. I have no clear memories of childhood rape. I remember emotional and physical abuse from her and my "father", and sexual abuse from his girlfriend, but I don&apos;t have any explicit memories of being raped.. Is there any meditation I can do to see the past? I want to know if this is real or not. I feel like I&apos;m crazy sometimes. I say to myself, "there&apos;s no way even she wouldve done that", but then I have doubts, and then if I try to say "maybe she did do it", I second guess myself and I think "or maybe you&apos;re crazy and you imagined it all". I&apos;m so sick of not knowing. Could vibrating Wunjo help with this, or is there a more effective way of verifying whether these memories are real or false?

 

[jessica stonewhite]

I have suffered from the similar abuse, not knowing what is real can be unbearable at times. Your mind blocked out these memories to protect you and it releases little peices of it when it feels you are ready to start processing and working through some of it. Meditations can help you  to work through it and remember  some of it but you must build up your strength first get through the 40-day program  start working on other meditations in the  meditation page. Wunjo will help but you have to be prepared for what it might bring up you will be very emotional as well Keep a journal to record everything it will help you put together some of the pieces write down any and all gut feelings you may start to notice that you have had guides helping you the whole time and you just didn't even realize it until looking at the bigger picture. Start writing letters to those who  hurt you even if you never give it to them the letters are for you, in them let them know what they did to hurt you and how it affected them and that they are responsible for their actions and you are not.

On Nov 7, 2017 3:52 AM, "wrenthewolfie@... [JoyofSatan666]" <[url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url] wrote:

  I'm sorry for the length of this, but please read it through. I seriously need some answers.

Hi, everyone! Firstly, I wanna apologize. I don't often get to post here anymore because of work, so I'm sorry for not contributing a whole lot. There's that and I don't have WiFi at home. I literally have to go to restaurants and stuff to get WiFi from my phone, and I just today figured out how to post from my phone. But I've been following along with the groups best I can.

Now, onto my questions. For awhile, I was in not the best if relationships and I got depressed. Nightshift was also extremely exhausting for me. But I was stupid enough to stop meditating, so I missed some days, and for awhile I was on again and off again with meditation and yoga. My momentum had been screwed up now, no doubt, but I've been slowly building back to what I used to do. So far, I'm doing meditation and hatha yoga during the day, and I'm working on implementing the night meditation and kundalini yoga back into my regular schedule. I'm trying not to do it all at once because I tried that before and it took a lot out of me, so I'm slowly but surely rebuilding my momentum. My question is, is it bad that instead of restarting the 40 day program I picked up where I used to be with breathing exercises, yoga, meditation, etc? Is that damaging for my soul? It doesn't seem like it's harmful so far; my energy buzzes are getting stronger and stronger by the day like they used to. But I just need confirmation that I'm not doing something harmful.

As for my second question, when I left that bad relationship, I got with another person. That person was the first person I ever had sex with, but as we were doing it I recognized the feeling of being inside someone. It physically felt so familiar, and almost immediately after I realized this, I thought of my "mother". I don't know how to explain it, but I felt dirty and had a feeling that she had sex with me. I put mother in quotes because she was very abusive and not a mother at all to me. But still, I don't remember anything like that. I have no clear memories of childhood rape. I remember emotional and physical abuse from her and my "father", and sexual abuse from his girlfriend, but I don't have any explicit memories of being raped.. Is there any meditation I can do to see the past? I want to know if this is real or not. I feel like I'm crazy sometimes. I say to myself, "there's no way even she wouldve done that", but then I have doubts, and then if I try to say "maybe she did do it", I second guess myself and I think "or maybe you're crazy and you imagined it all". I'm so sick of not knowing. Could vibrating Wunjo help with this, or is there a more effective way of verifying whether these memories are real or false?

 

[[email protected]]

Thank you for your help. I'm sorry you've been through anything close to similar. I'll definitely start using the Wunjo rune and also the past life regression meditation as was also suggested. Is it necessary to restart from day 1 on the 40 day program though? I may be speaking out of ignorance, so correct me if I'm wrong, but I've been slowly picking up where I left off with meditation. I'm doing yoga and meditation every day again like I was after I finished the program, and I still feel energy buzzes afterward and stuff. Is it necessary to start all over again with the program?