HPS Lydia
Moderator
When I was new, for the first year and a half of being dedicated, I did as advised on the JoS and kept a “training journal”, like a Book of Shadows, in a word doc. I successfully and consistently recorded every day, the meditations I did, my experiences, and any psychic events. Side note, I have never skipped a single day of meditating, in all these 11 years of being dedicated to Satan.
I thought my journal had been lost for years. And then, one day recently, I found it! (During the latest Mercury Retrograde of course.)
I’m reading through it now, and wow, it is amazing to have this all recorded. Over 50 pages of small font single spaced.
It is reminding me how different it is to be new, and that we cannot have high demands on newer members (advising them to do a bunch of workings, telling them to have a full meditation routine, and so on). I had natural talent for meditation, most things in the JoS meditation section and the 6 month training program were easy for me, but wow was I dizzy easily just from spinning my chakras! And I stuck with very low reps for mantras for quite a while.
Apparently I only cleaned my aura every second day at most, and only did AoP every 3-4 days. It wasn’t until my 38th day of being dedicated that I finally got into the habit of cleaning every day. And I noted quite a few times that I fell asleep at night before doing my AoP, I actually wrote “I fell asleep before doing my AoP” and I had not done it at all that day.
When I did my AoP, for a while the best I could do was a bronze outline a small distance from my body, lol. I couldn’t get the white-gold like the sun until consistently practicing for a little while. It was literally like an outline, not even filling my aura.
I had done some basic healing, breathing in green energy, twice on an early day of being dedicated, in the first week actually, to heal some scars on my skin. I noted the next day that I had hardly slept that night, and woke up feeling drained and sore. So to any newer members reading this, don’t be hard on yourself for not being able to do a lot.
My first time closing chakras, I noted how I felt (“immediately felt more peaceful, closed-off, void but in a good way. This feeling started as soon as I closed the base.”) And as I read that, I can see myself at that time, doing these meditations, having those experiences. I even remember the couch I was sitting on.
Also, another day I was writing in my journal and then had a mini-vision, I even wrote what it was right after it happened: a glimpse of myself in a past life. Very special to have recorded that
And it seems like a Demon helped me in my first week with the pendulum, as I had really great and accurate results, but in all later dates noted in the following months, I wrote that I had no luck with the pendulum. I’ve noticed other members having this same experience, which is why I’m mentioning it. The Demons do help us out when we are new.
My 70th day after dedicating (I literally wrote in numbered days instead of the actual date for a while) was when I joined the yahoo groups and joined in with a group destruction ritual that was to be done that very day (this was before the RTR’s). This is what I wrote: “It was a little shabby (my alter was constructed last-minute, I explained this to Satan and got the feeling that it was quite alright), but I feel like I’ve accomplished at least something, helped out a little, which is better than nothing I suppose. I used as much dirty red color as possible, did not invoke it into myself, and made sure to clean my aura and chakras afterwards.”
The following day I noted in my journal that I had a headache all day, and reading it, I had not done my AoP at all the day of or after the ritual. Rookie mistake.
Side note, I remember but had not recorded it, that 2 seconds after finishing that ritual (which was my first ritual, destroying the enemies or the catholic church or something), the phone rang and it was the local pizza place offering me a discount on my next pizza order. I thanked them, hung up, and then thought that this may have been a gift from Satan as a “thank you” for participating in the ritual.
The following day I wrote that I found advice that we should clean aura and chakras and do AoP often, so that explains why I had not been doing them daily: I didn’t know we were supposed to. Lol.
It wasn’t until I had been dedicating and training for two and a half months that I was finally able to see the white for cleaning and white-gold for protecting, so for those of you who are new, don’t give up if you can’t see astrally. Use your will, know that your aura and chakras are being cleaned even if you can’t see it. When I could finally see it, I wrote it in my journal and even added an exclamation mark, I was so excited, lol.
I didn’t start doing kundalini yoga until nearly 3 months in.
I wrote that I had posted a question to the yahoo group (this was before the forums were created), and then wrote the next day that I received an answer from another member who was more experienced. I won’t say what, as it isn’t important, but I’m stating this as it is wonderful that we have the opportunity to ask others for help and guidance!
I seem to have gradually built up with the 10 Tibetan Breaths, I started with only 2 of them, and over the course of some months I added more until I was doing all 10.
I just wanted to post this to inspire others to keep a journal/BoS, make sure to keep it safe though, your safety comes first so don’t keep one if there is a good chance it will be discovered.
This is so incredibly special, and inspiring to me. I feel much better, stronger, and more sure of myself for having read my journal from all those years ago.
When you are focused on living day to day, you often don’t see the progress you are making. But looking back years later, seeing what you had written, you will see that you have made tremendous progress! I almost can’t believe there was a time when I struggled with visualization, for example.
My advice to new members: don’t be hard on yourself! And my advice to older members: don’t be too hard on the new members! This is a complicated journey that we take, mostly alone, we had no preparation for it in school or life, there’s a lot to figure out.
Best wishes to all of you on your Satanic Path of Advancement!
Hail Satan!
I thought my journal had been lost for years. And then, one day recently, I found it! (During the latest Mercury Retrograde of course.)
I’m reading through it now, and wow, it is amazing to have this all recorded. Over 50 pages of small font single spaced.
It is reminding me how different it is to be new, and that we cannot have high demands on newer members (advising them to do a bunch of workings, telling them to have a full meditation routine, and so on). I had natural talent for meditation, most things in the JoS meditation section and the 6 month training program were easy for me, but wow was I dizzy easily just from spinning my chakras! And I stuck with very low reps for mantras for quite a while.
Apparently I only cleaned my aura every second day at most, and only did AoP every 3-4 days. It wasn’t until my 38th day of being dedicated that I finally got into the habit of cleaning every day. And I noted quite a few times that I fell asleep at night before doing my AoP, I actually wrote “I fell asleep before doing my AoP” and I had not done it at all that day.
When I did my AoP, for a while the best I could do was a bronze outline a small distance from my body, lol. I couldn’t get the white-gold like the sun until consistently practicing for a little while. It was literally like an outline, not even filling my aura.
I had done some basic healing, breathing in green energy, twice on an early day of being dedicated, in the first week actually, to heal some scars on my skin. I noted the next day that I had hardly slept that night, and woke up feeling drained and sore. So to any newer members reading this, don’t be hard on yourself for not being able to do a lot.
My first time closing chakras, I noted how I felt (“immediately felt more peaceful, closed-off, void but in a good way. This feeling started as soon as I closed the base.”) And as I read that, I can see myself at that time, doing these meditations, having those experiences. I even remember the couch I was sitting on.
Also, another day I was writing in my journal and then had a mini-vision, I even wrote what it was right after it happened: a glimpse of myself in a past life. Very special to have recorded that
And it seems like a Demon helped me in my first week with the pendulum, as I had really great and accurate results, but in all later dates noted in the following months, I wrote that I had no luck with the pendulum. I’ve noticed other members having this same experience, which is why I’m mentioning it. The Demons do help us out when we are new.
My 70th day after dedicating (I literally wrote in numbered days instead of the actual date for a while) was when I joined the yahoo groups and joined in with a group destruction ritual that was to be done that very day (this was before the RTR’s). This is what I wrote: “It was a little shabby (my alter was constructed last-minute, I explained this to Satan and got the feeling that it was quite alright), but I feel like I’ve accomplished at least something, helped out a little, which is better than nothing I suppose. I used as much dirty red color as possible, did not invoke it into myself, and made sure to clean my aura and chakras afterwards.”
The following day I noted in my journal that I had a headache all day, and reading it, I had not done my AoP at all the day of or after the ritual. Rookie mistake.
Side note, I remember but had not recorded it, that 2 seconds after finishing that ritual (which was my first ritual, destroying the enemies or the catholic church or something), the phone rang and it was the local pizza place offering me a discount on my next pizza order. I thanked them, hung up, and then thought that this may have been a gift from Satan as a “thank you” for participating in the ritual.
The following day I wrote that I found advice that we should clean aura and chakras and do AoP often, so that explains why I had not been doing them daily: I didn’t know we were supposed to. Lol.
It wasn’t until I had been dedicating and training for two and a half months that I was finally able to see the white for cleaning and white-gold for protecting, so for those of you who are new, don’t give up if you can’t see astrally. Use your will, know that your aura and chakras are being cleaned even if you can’t see it. When I could finally see it, I wrote it in my journal and even added an exclamation mark, I was so excited, lol.
I didn’t start doing kundalini yoga until nearly 3 months in.
I wrote that I had posted a question to the yahoo group (this was before the forums were created), and then wrote the next day that I received an answer from another member who was more experienced. I won’t say what, as it isn’t important, but I’m stating this as it is wonderful that we have the opportunity to ask others for help and guidance!
I seem to have gradually built up with the 10 Tibetan Breaths, I started with only 2 of them, and over the course of some months I added more until I was doing all 10.
I just wanted to post this to inspire others to keep a journal/BoS, make sure to keep it safe though, your safety comes first so don’t keep one if there is a good chance it will be discovered.
This is so incredibly special, and inspiring to me. I feel much better, stronger, and more sure of myself for having read my journal from all those years ago.
When you are focused on living day to day, you often don’t see the progress you are making. But looking back years later, seeing what you had written, you will see that you have made tremendous progress! I almost can’t believe there was a time when I struggled with visualization, for example.
My advice to new members: don’t be hard on yourself! And my advice to older members: don’t be too hard on the new members! This is a complicated journey that we take, mostly alone, we had no preparation for it in school or life, there’s a lot to figure out.
Best wishes to all of you on your Satanic Path of Advancement!
Hail Satan!
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