thisisafalsealias
New member
- Joined
- Jun 27, 2005
- Messages
- 5
@zolaluckystar This is probably the first extended conversation I had on this forum centred around, I guess, personality you could say. One of the few extended conversations I’ve had on here period actually. And I as well am really enjoying it 
I write black metal, classical guitar and symphonic music for the most part but I have done other things as well. The music I have recorded is all basically just for me to have totally relatable music to listen to and to have, and while I have sold music and still do make money with it, I wouldn’t call myself a professional musician just yet because of that. I want to be able to compose beautiful classical music but I got a long way, I’m poor at inventive phrasing and my music often sounds video gamey. I’ve been playing music as a release since I was pretty young, and it was my dream to be really good, so now I am one of the best guitarists and drummers from where I am from. I can play quite a few other instruments at an intermediate level like cello, flute/fife/piccolo, piano, saxophone, etc. My mother knew I was lonely and had passion so she would rent me an instrument every once in a while.
I’m usually not into casual sex though I do know people I would love to chase after. I just haven’t been in a situation to initiate it yet, and for some reason, I often just lack interest in actually committing intercourse with people I’m not close with. I get a better high off imagining passionate and warm sex with someone I know rather than having awkward, cold sex. If that makes sense. I know its a totally superficial thing too, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. I do like emotional highs more though because I’m a very, very emotional person. Though when I am very horny I will literally walk around and all day just think “I want to fuck you so badly, let me *** inside you” to just random people who I know, mutual friends and etc lol.
That is neat that you were a psychic for a paranormal research gig, what a sweet job. My friend just told me his new gal’s mother is a professional paranormal researcher. I don’t know why the hell we broke up. But I remember what happened and this was before I dedicated as a warrior for Hell. I started investing a lot more time into spiritual development last October, and I unlocked a siddhi. I knew she was psychic too, but at this point I knew instantly that I was going to have to dedicate to fight for this and I would have passion over this whereas she doesn’t even know she is psychic. I’ve told her many times before she has a serious spiritual gift. She goes to church but I don’t think she actually believes in gawd, she just likes the community; she’s all about community. She’s really like my sleeping princess. Also like you, she liked to share initiation, but I wouldn’t want a girl who didn’t have guts though I like making my chosen girl happy actively by actually showing I love her and care about her. Its just satisfying and makes you feel active in love.The reason why I broke out of depression so quick was because at this moment of unlocking the siddhi and shortly after, I immediately realized all the things I had thought and predicted over the years were true. And I found real hope. After seeing myself actually perform the siddhi consciously, just by staring and thinking and (telekinisis) I got the feeling that if my dreams from when I was like ten years old of learning how to do it were coming true, so all the others would too, including reincarnation, being a hero of sorts, etc. I still get very sad and very angry sometimes but its just natural now and it doesn’t feel like its weighing me down, doesn’t feel like this sick unnatural thing, though I get angry if I feel my life situation is a burden to me. I’ve always been pretty psychic I think but never really realized until later, although when I was young, I went a little bonkers and started seeing entities everywhere, going into these odd trances, and things like that started happening. I thought I was going mad. But then I started realizing I could simply see things that others couldn’t so I kept developing my mind until I could make people call me a wizard or a sorcerer by engaging in my environment, so then I knew it was obviously true that I had psychic power and wasn’t just blowing myself.
Sucks you had that experience too with a psycho cunt, psychic vampires are fucking annoying things. When I split with my bitch I angrily scrawled in my journal, “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?” because I couldn’t understand how she could be so utterly manipulative and sick. It turned out she was apparently jewish in part, enough said. I’m glad that nightmare is over…
I think that you get the point of relationships is to try and add an element to your life, which is the other person, and not try to complete yourself. I definitely don’t need a relationship either, but I like intimacy and closeness with other human beings a lot, so when someone special comes along at the right time, I figure why not. You always get something and lose something from it, its just about finding people who give you something good and make you lose some thing in your mind or soul that is inhibiting you, learning a lesson. That’s how I view love relationships anyways
That’s hilarious that you are so big and yet they still think you are a girl. Obviously they can not see at all or they are just plain stupid and unaware.
I write black metal, classical guitar and symphonic music for the most part but I have done other things as well. The music I have recorded is all basically just for me to have totally relatable music to listen to and to have, and while I have sold music and still do make money with it, I wouldn’t call myself a professional musician just yet because of that. I want to be able to compose beautiful classical music but I got a long way, I’m poor at inventive phrasing and my music often sounds video gamey. I’ve been playing music as a release since I was pretty young, and it was my dream to be really good, so now I am one of the best guitarists and drummers from where I am from. I can play quite a few other instruments at an intermediate level like cello, flute/fife/piccolo, piano, saxophone, etc. My mother knew I was lonely and had passion so she would rent me an instrument every once in a while.
I’m usually not into casual sex though I do know people I would love to chase after. I just haven’t been in a situation to initiate it yet, and for some reason, I often just lack interest in actually committing intercourse with people I’m not close with. I get a better high off imagining passionate and warm sex with someone I know rather than having awkward, cold sex. If that makes sense. I know its a totally superficial thing too, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. I do like emotional highs more though because I’m a very, very emotional person. Though when I am very horny I will literally walk around and all day just think “I want to fuck you so badly, let me *** inside you” to just random people who I know, mutual friends and etc lol.
That is neat that you were a psychic for a paranormal research gig, what a sweet job. My friend just told me his new gal’s mother is a professional paranormal researcher. I don’t know why the hell we broke up. But I remember what happened and this was before I dedicated as a warrior for Hell. I started investing a lot more time into spiritual development last October, and I unlocked a siddhi. I knew she was psychic too, but at this point I knew instantly that I was going to have to dedicate to fight for this and I would have passion over this whereas she doesn’t even know she is psychic. I’ve told her many times before she has a serious spiritual gift. She goes to church but I don’t think she actually believes in gawd, she just likes the community; she’s all about community. She’s really like my sleeping princess. Also like you, she liked to share initiation, but I wouldn’t want a girl who didn’t have guts though I like making my chosen girl happy actively by actually showing I love her and care about her. Its just satisfying and makes you feel active in love.The reason why I broke out of depression so quick was because at this moment of unlocking the siddhi and shortly after, I immediately realized all the things I had thought and predicted over the years were true. And I found real hope. After seeing myself actually perform the siddhi consciously, just by staring and thinking and (telekinisis) I got the feeling that if my dreams from when I was like ten years old of learning how to do it were coming true, so all the others would too, including reincarnation, being a hero of sorts, etc. I still get very sad and very angry sometimes but its just natural now and it doesn’t feel like its weighing me down, doesn’t feel like this sick unnatural thing, though I get angry if I feel my life situation is a burden to me. I’ve always been pretty psychic I think but never really realized until later, although when I was young, I went a little bonkers and started seeing entities everywhere, going into these odd trances, and things like that started happening. I thought I was going mad. But then I started realizing I could simply see things that others couldn’t so I kept developing my mind until I could make people call me a wizard or a sorcerer by engaging in my environment, so then I knew it was obviously true that I had psychic power and wasn’t just blowing myself.
Sucks you had that experience too with a psycho cunt, psychic vampires are fucking annoying things. When I split with my bitch I angrily scrawled in my journal, “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?” because I couldn’t understand how she could be so utterly manipulative and sick. It turned out she was apparently jewish in part, enough said. I’m glad that nightmare is over…
I think that you get the point of relationships is to try and add an element to your life, which is the other person, and not try to complete yourself. I definitely don’t need a relationship either, but I like intimacy and closeness with other human beings a lot, so when someone special comes along at the right time, I figure why not. You always get something and lose something from it, its just about finding people who give you something good and make you lose some thing in your mind or soul that is inhibiting you, learning a lesson. That’s how I view love relationships anyways
That’s hilarious that you are so big and yet they still think you are a girl. Obviously they can not see at all or they are just plain stupid and unaware.