Thank you for the reply. Yes, honestly, I often feel loneliness, emptiness, a lack of purpose.
Right now I flew to Mallorca, where I’m supposed to be resting, and even that doesn’t give me enough joy.
And I don’t enjoy it the way I feel I could.
Because I’m exhausted, because I work and I don’t understand why I’m working.
I try to do things with all my strength, but I feel like a squeezed-out lemon.
I try to achieve something.
I don’t live in my home country, I’m trying to settle in Europe, in a new place.
I constantly have doubts.
Should I do this? Should I do that?
Should I be doing what I’m doing now — is it right or wrong?
Because work is draining me.
I work in three shifts, including night shifts, morning shifts.
Often I wake up at 3 a.m. to get ready and go to work.
I also work night shifts from 9 p.m. to 5 a.m.
So I can’t really say I’m full of energy.
Although there are moments when I feel inspired, satisfied, full of energy.
But those moments are becoming fewer and fewer.
I feel that something needs to change.
I feel that I need a mentor, someone who could look at my strengths and weaknesses and give some advice, some practical guidance.
I feel that greatly and I myself have been showed by the Guardians that sometimes the kindness thing is allow you to stew in your own problems. Each of them went through this and it's also why they are kind, but they also know of the self lying we do.
Your Guardian is your mentor and until you can interact with them in a meaningful way you pretty much aren't ready to do any real work anyways. The truth is for this situation one simply needs to deal with it. Struggle and hate it and ruminate enough that they found themselves an out. No one is coming to save you, even those in the temple or the clergy. Aside from, maybe, helping you if you're "on fire" the simple truth is it can do far more harm then good in the long run to over help someone because of reliance.
Living this can be hard and it's forgetting that the problem. Even in your day to day life try to always have something positive on your mind and you'll find that it takes training and skill to come back to it. Also intentions, you must have the intention of wanting to be saved/open to help. Often times we are spoken too by that voice we don't wanna listen too and it's actually fueled by the Gods. After all why go through the effort of creating water in your hands when you can convince the heavens to rain down for you.
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Always keep up with our Esteemed Leaders because you would be surprised how often you'll be lead to a sermon, have one suggested, or one is made that speaks to you.
Welcome. You are here to learn, understand, and improve—this is the path of the Gods. This guide is created to give a path and general overview of the Temple of Zeus, its teachings, essential knowledge, and how to understand and apply them. This will literally include everything you need. This...
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And I myself am reading through this! April is really awesome so reading through his words can aid you as well.
Is it possible to do this work for a whole year straight, just like I did with the Wunjo rune? I know I will need more than 90 days. I find it uncomfortable to think about all the unpleasant things from past lives that will come to the surface.
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Today is also a great day for spurital things. It's a Esbat, A full moon grants us mighty power just as the void can cancel it out, and a day for a Jupiter square for me.
https://astroapollo.org/#/astro-calendars
Literally a Gods send. Single most important file you might download today if you don't have one yet.
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For my own personal advice is if you are unhappy it's because either life isn't what you want or you are ill in some way. Either needing trauma relief, time to gather yourself, or just breathing room; but something is wanting, and calling, for change that can only be started by you. I'm making it sound much easier than it is but, real talk, to get better you need to be broken down in just the right way that kicks yourself into gear: which is what the Gods grant us.
Life is only even enjoyable because of them due to the fact it isn't made to be comfortable, or pleasurable in any way. Do bugs look happy to you? Do the trees not mourn their own helplessness? Evolution is what enables the ability to receive any sort of consistency and that is what it means to be an eternal force.
Happiness is in a fleeting moment, a single drop of ambrosia carried as a water lily upon a great wave of purpose.
Things that are done in the past are over with but we hold onto them thus our joy is killed needlessly. We suffer pain due to weakness and thus our joy is killed needlessly. We spin tales about ourselves and others and thus our joys is killed needlessly.
Displeasure has the cure in being stoic which is why it's a virtue. Unhappiness has the cure in being joyful but bringing joy to yourself is a problem.
I enjoy being able to make food for someone. It's something I believe is an art I should get into and it will bring fulfillment in my life aka Purpose. Find your purpose little by little and help change those around you.
I was just told by someone that I am argumentative because I don't accept things against Zevism such as plain lies or xianism. It was given as an insult but it was given to me and I turned it into two angular points for myself instead: I am still far to confrontational when I need to be more influential/elevated but it also is a minor compliment. I only even got onto this path because of my willingness to war with the current state of culture and "religion" so it isn't something I ever wanna give up, but instead transform. For the things in your life you gotta do that. It's really hard and I lose myself everyday but I'm trying to work at fostering intentions which is the thing I think a lot struggle with.
Is your intention in life, while living each day, to bring yourself joy; or just to do what is needed to go to sleep and wake up the next day? Do you actively meditate in a meaningful way? Are you scatterbrained? I myself have found wordpad is my friend. I love typing, I enjoy the flow of hitting the keys just right, and I can express myself.
Last thing would be to find people you idolize
Reading as actually made me cry more than once. Like those sort of joyful tears you get than just swell and make you feel amazing.
If you're very judgmental, take some time to stop sharpening your sword and aim it at yourself; but if you're not at all quickly start stabbing at your problems like a madman until you gain momentum.