MY TESTIMONY

[spencerlfa]

Family today I will speak. I will speak because I want to encourage the newcomers, I speak because I want to give back all the more experienced more have done, and I speak to honor Him, the true God.


I'm a Satanist for around 5 months. 5 months is not much, 5 months is nothing compared to some people we can find here. Regardless, 5 months is MORE than enough to realize the wonders of our Father.
I remember before coming here.. I was so fucking lost... I didn't know who I was, I was always depressed for no reason, I simply couldn't find myself, I felt like I was split in many fragments. I had no reason to be , no reason to exist.
I knew jackshit - I knew nothing about nothing. I was like cattle. Once I strumbled across this website, and boy, was that my best decision.


I'm not going to make this long - Yes this is hard, yes you will cry many times in the middle of the night, yes you will feel lonely, yes meditations can be very harsh sometimes, yes yoga is energy consuming, yes yes yes....
But this is the essence of what we are. Without all this hard moments, we would be weak. This is the balance.


However, I'm here to tell you once more that this is not a fucking joke. We are not fucking around, and Father Satan WILL COMPLETELY BETTER YOUR LIFE IF YOU WISH SO.

In 5 months I became a different person, I became MYSELF, the person that I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE. This alone is a one life-time process many people don't even dream of. How many people in the street actually know themselves?


Like the good Father he is, he WILL give you gifts, if you HONOR him and TAKE DOWN his enemies.
I remember once, in one of my earliest rituals, I asked a favor for Father , I asked him, if he could help me with my artistic career , since it's what I enjoy the most, if He agreed with me and believed it was the best option.I told him I would honour him and get the messages he wanted me to get across.


Needless to say, this week I got a proposal for a band and this band is already a big deal here in my town.


I wrote this down just to remind you, specially in dark times like these, where I feel, and I'm sure you feel as well, drained out of energy.
Remember that FATHER will REWARD you, because he is JUST AND FAIR.


I wrote this down because it's the only possible way I thought to thank Father for all his wonders.

to ousiders - DO WHAT WE DO AND YOU WILL FEEL WHAT WE FEEL

Ave Satanas

 

[Koya (Dakota)]

Bloody hell, mate. Your middle statement made me tear up a bit, as it hit me square on the head on what I've been struggling with. One of the goals I have with Satanism is to build a relationship with Satan and the other demons, to combat my every night lonliness.

Through my entire life, I've only made acquaintances, hardly any were real friends aside from four people. Many of these acquaintances would pass me by, not paying any real mind to me day after day. It became depressing, and in highschool was where I needed the love the most. After just losing my biological father (We kicked his slob ass out) I felt unwanted, disloved and terrible.

I returned to the JoS site just last night, actually, and I felt some feeling that I haven't felt since Freshman year. I was only dabbling, dipping in and out, previously dedicated while unmature. Boy, I feel like a damn fool for even stepping foot in a church looking for "god" after reading over the site again. I feel regret, mainly. I hope to patch things up with satan and the other demons, but after losing their sigils, trying christainity again, this and that, I wonder how they'll ever forgive me.

Regardless, I'll have to try again, this time with renewed ambitions, deeper understanding and a slightly aged maturity, now being a legal adult and all.

Thanks for the pep talk, mister. I hope I can patch things up with everyone again. Not sure how to go about doing it, I'm not even sure which direction I should go from here.

Chin up, head high, feet forward, march. Thanks again.

Hail Satan!
-Koya

Sent from my LG phone

spencerlfa <igorbedzor@... wrote:

Family today I will speak. I will speak because I want to encourage the newcomers, I speak because I want to give back all the more experienced more have done, and I speak to honor Him, the true God.


I'm a Satanist for around 5 months. 5 months is not much, 5 months is nothing compared to some people we can find here. Regardless, 5 months is MORE than enough to realize the wonders of our Father.
I remember before coming here.. I was so fucking lost... I didn't know who I was, I was always depressed for no reason, I simply couldn't find myself, I felt like I was split in many fragments. I had no reason to be , no reason to exist.
I knew jackshit - I knew nothing about nothing. I was like cattle. Once I strumbled across this website, and boy, was that my best decision.


I'm not going to make this long - Yes this is hard, yes you will cry many times in the middle of the night, yes you will feel lonely, yes meditations can be very harsh sometimes, yes yoga is energy consuming, yes yes yes....
But this is the essence of what we are. Without all this hard moments, we would be weak. This is the balance.


However, I'm here to tell you once more that this is not a fucking joke. We are not fucking around, and Father Satan WILL COMPLETELY BETTER YOUR LIFE IF YOU WISH SO.

In 5 months I became a different person, I became MYSELF, the person that I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE. This alone is a one life-time process many people don't even dream of. How many people in the street actually know themselves?


Like the good Father he is, he WILL give you gifts, if you HONOR him and TAKE DOWN his enemies.
I remember once, in one of my earliest rituals, I asked a favor for Father , I asked him, if he could help me with my artistic career , since it's what I enjoy the most, if He agreed with me and believed it was the best option.I told him I would honour him and get the messages he wanted me to get across.


Needless to say, this week I got a proposal for a band and this band is already a big deal here in my town.


I wrote this down just to remind you, specially in dark times like these, where I feel, and I'm sure you feel as well, drained out of energy.
Remember that FATHER will REWARD you, because he is JUST AND FAIR.


I wrote this down because it's the only possible way I thought to thank Father for all his wonders.

to ousiders - DO WHAT WE DO AND YOU WILL FEEL WHAT WE FEEL

Ave Satanas

 

[Allison P]

Like i said in reply to your latest post, just talk to him. Tell him
your feelings, fears etc. He will listen, and he will respond. Maybe
not quite in the way you expect, but rest assured that he will. Just
be open. To coin the xian phrase: the Lord Satanas works in mysterious
ways. This is very true, though the latter phrase is most cheesy when
xians use it. Lol. Hail Father Satan always! Hail Lord Andras!

On 3/18/13, Koya (Dakota) <koyaghost@... wrote:
Bloody hell, mate. Your middle statement made me tear up a bit, as it hit me
square on the head on what I've been struggling with. One of the goals I
have with Satanism is to build a relationship with Satan and the other
demons, to combat my every night lonliness.

Through my entire life, I've only made acquaintances, hardly any were real
friends aside from four people. Many of these acquaintances would pass me
by, not paying any real mind to me day after day. It became depressing, and
in highschool was where I needed the love the most. After just losing my
biological father (We kicked his slob ass out) I felt unwanted, disloved and
terrible.

I returned to the JoS site just last night, actually, and I felt some
feeling that I haven't felt since Freshman year. I was only dabbling,
dipping in and out, previously dedicated while unmature. Boy, I feel like a
damn fool for even stepping foot in a church looking for "god" after reading
over the site again. I feel regret, mainly. I hope to patch things up with
satan and the other demons, but after losing their sigils, trying
christainity again, this and that, I wonder how they'll ever forgive me.

Regardless, I'll have to try again, this time with renewed ambitions, deeper
understanding and a slightly aged maturity, now being a legal adult and all.

Thanks for the pep talk, mister. I hope I can patch things up with everyone
again. Not sure how to go about doing it, I'm not even sure which direction
I should go from here.

Chin up, head high, feet forward, march. Thanks again.

Hail Satan!
-Koya

Sent from my LG phone

spencerlfa <igorbedzor@... wrote:

Family today I will speak. I will speak because I want to encourage the
newcomers, I speak because I want to give back all the more experienced
more have done, and I speak to honor Him, the true God.


I'm a Satanist for around 5 months. 5 months is not much, 5 months is
nothing compared to some people we can find here. Regardless, 5 months is
MORE than enough to realize the wonders of our Father.
I remember before coming here.. I was so fucking lost... I didn't know
who I was, I was always depressed for no reason, I simply couldn't find
myself, I felt like I was split in many fragments. I had no reason to be ,
no reason to exist.
I knew jackshit - I knew nothing about nothing. I was like cattle. Once
I strumbled across this website, and boy, was that my best decision.


I'm not going to make this long - Yes this is hard, yes you will cry many
times in the middle of the night, yes you will feel lonely, yes
meditations can be very harsh sometimes, yes yoga is energy consuming, yes
yes yes....
But this is the essence of what we are. Without all this hard moments,
we would be weak. This is the balance.


However, I'm here to tell you once more that this is not a fucking joke.
We are not fucking around, and Father Satan WILL COMPLETELY BETTER YOUR
LIFE IF YOU WISH SO.

In 5 months I became a different person, I became MYSELF, the person that I
ALWAYS WANTED TO BE. This alone is a one life-time process many people
don't even dream of. How many people in the street actually know
themselves?


Like the good Father he is, he WILL give you gifts, if you HONOR him and
TAKE DOWN his enemies.
I remember once, in one of my earliest rituals, I asked a favor for
Father , I asked him, if he could help me with my artistic career , since
it's what I enjoy the most, if He agreed with me and believed it was the
best option.I told him I would honour him and get the messages he wanted
me to get across.


Needless to say, this week I got a proposal for a band and this band is
already a big deal here in my town.


I wrote this down just to remind you, specially in dark times like these,
where I feel, and I'm sure you feel as well, drained out of energy.
Remember that FATHER will REWARD you, because he is JUST AND FAIR.


I wrote this down because it's the only possible way I thought to thank
Father for all his wonders.

to ousiders - DO WHAT WE DO AND YOU WILL FEEL WHAT WE FEEL

Ave Satanas