Accidentally Disrespected Higher ranking Demons. Assistance is reque

[koyaghost]

A few years back when I first started practicing Satanism, I printed off a few sigils of various demons and kept them in a folder, or would often hand draw these images as a crude copy from the JoS site and keep them close. However, over the years, after leaving the religion (And seemingly coming back to it because everything feels right about satanism.) I have lost those Sigils, and now I fear that I've not only disrespected a few dozen demons, but Satan himself.

I just got back to JoS this night, rummaging through my memories and recollected this place. I seem to maraciously remember a lot from nearly four years ago, when I first started (Around 14 in age.)
I've done the dedication ritual in the past, and I feel pretty bad about losing those sigils, as they have no doubt not been properly disposed of. Parents and all can be quite a fickle thing.

I'd like to know if there'd be anything worth doing to appease the potentially pissed demons I offed all those years ago. I know I left the religion previously under strange circumstances, and I'd like to get back to the swing of things, hopefully under better standards and graces than I currently believe I'm in now.

Also, While I was in deep thought, I came up with an arguement about Satan, that I'd like input on. I've never been able to properly meditate given any instance of which I have tried. There have been many methods which I've practiced, all not seeming to work. Using this idea to strive for a goal, I belittled myself that Satan will not (Reward) me with love until I overcome this goal. While a part of me believes that I will still feel his presence and love, despite not progressing towards this goal, which would defeat the purpose of growing stronger as an individual, which also defeats a key purpose of Satanism, growing stronger as one.

What I'm trying to say is, depite all the shit I've pulled in my unmature years of then and now, will Satan continue to love me? All the reward I've ever wanted was something that akin to a father figure, there to hold my hand and baby me like a child. I didn't grow up with such a parental figure, and part of my innocent childhood lingers in the past, which subsequentally holds a large portion of my personality. I'm not afraid to admit that I've been babied my entire life. Never by my father, though.
Sorry for the confused questions, even I'm not sure what I mean. I just want to be loved while striving for goals that are possible. Though despite the years, I've yet to get into a deep meditative stance........

 

[Aquarian Clown]

i really dont know what to do about those sigils, maybe ask your parents if u think they will be okay with u keeping strange symbols.

as for Father's love yea i think he still loves you and will accept you because when you left you were still young and immature but now ur mature and ready to devote yourself fully.

if i were you i would do something for Father Satan and all the Demons. like write a poem, do some drawing, recruit many people, write a book, translate meditations from JoS etc.

Hail Satan!!!

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "koyaghost" <koyaghost@... wrote:

A few years back when I first started practicing Satanism, I printed off a few sigils of various demons and kept them in a folder, or would often hand draw these images as a crude copy from the JoS site and keep them close. However, over the years, after leaving the religion (And seemingly coming back to it because everything feels right about satanism.) I have lost those Sigils, and now I fear that I've not only disrespected a few dozen demons, but Satan himself.

I just got back to JoS this night, rummaging through my memories and recollected this place. I seem to maraciously remember a lot from nearly four years ago, when I first started (Around 14 in age.)
I've done the dedication ritual in the past, and I feel pretty bad about losing those sigils, as they have no doubt not been properly disposed of. Parents and all can be quite a fickle thing.

I'd like to know if there'd be anything worth doing to appease the potentially pissed demons I offed all those years ago. I know I left the religion previously under strange circumstances, and I'd like to get back to the swing of things, hopefully under better standards and graces than I currently believe I'm in now.

Also, While I was in deep thought, I came up with an arguement about Satan, that I'd like input on. I've never been able to properly meditate given any instance of which I have tried. There have been many methods which I've practiced, all not seeming to work. Using this idea to strive for a goal, I belittled myself that Satan will not (Reward) me with love until I overcome this goal. While a part of me believes that I will still feel his presence and love, despite not progressing towards this goal, which would defeat the purpose of growing stronger as an individual, which also defeats a key purpose of Satanism, growing stronger as one.

What I'm trying to say is, depite all the shit I've pulled in my unmature years of then and now, will Satan continue to love me? All the reward I've ever wanted was something that akin to a father figure, there to hold my hand and baby me like a child. I didn't grow up with such a parental figure, and part of my innocent childhood lingers in the past, which subsequentally holds a large portion of my personality. I'm not afraid to admit that I've been babied my entire life. Never by my father, though.
Sorry for the confused questions, even I'm not sure what I mean. I just want to be loved while striving for goals that are possible. Though despite the years, I've yet to get into a deep meditative stance........

 

[Koya (Dakota)]

They were lost and probably disrespectfully destroyed when I moved from Indiana, to Wisconsin. There may be a chance they're in an old folder, but most likely in horrible condition. I read through a few sermons of Maxine and in there, about demons, is to write a request, hold a ritual and burn the paper.

I've got a few things I'd like to say. And a poem? Well I'm not Edgar A. Poe, nor am I a modern day Shakespeare, but I'll see what I can do. Thanks for the tip. I'll burn that as well, keeping a digital copy lodged in the memory banks of this group, so be it approved by a Moderator.

I am a bit more mature, despite emotionally unstable. Maybe a bit more patient as well. I'll be holding a ritual tonight after cleaning a part of my room. Hold it up to the moon light (the note), prick my left finger and draw some blood, dot the end of the paper. Etcetc. Maybe I'm no good at Meditations, but I'll be damned if I don't have some ritual ideas lodged into my head. Maybe my purpose is to help others that need ritual ideas, I've got a ton of them. I'll get more as I progress, too.

Thanks for the tip, all the help I'm receiving has really opened my eyes a bit. Maybe I've got a decent shot of heading back to good graces. Now I just need to keep up with the practice. Once I move into the new house in Anderson Indiana, clean with a fresh start of my adult life, things will be easier.

(Still have to live with mum, though.)

Hail Satan!

(Thanks for the tips, really, thank you guys <3)

Sent from my LG phone

Aquarian Clown <cape.tsoe@... wrote:

i really dont know what to do about those sigils, maybe ask your parents if u think they will be okay with u keeping strange symbols.

as for Father's love yea i think he still loves you and will accept you because when you left you were still young and immature but now ur mature and ready to devote yourself fully.

if i were you i would do something for Father Satan and all the Demons. like write a poem, do some drawing, recruit many people, write a book, translate meditations from JoS etc.

Hail Satan!!!

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "koyaghost" <koyaghost@... wrote:

A few years back when I first started practicing Satanism, I printed off a few sigils of various demons and kept them in a folder, or would often hand draw these images as a crude copy from the JoS site and keep them close. However, over the years, after leaving the religion (And seemingly coming back to it because everything feels right about satanism.) I have lost those Sigils, and now I fear that I've not only disrespected a few dozen demons, but Satan himself.

I just got back to JoS this night, rummaging through my memories and recollected this place. I seem to maraciously remember a lot from nearly four years ago, when I first started (Around 14 in age.)
I've done the dedication ritual in the past, and I feel pretty bad about losing those sigils, as they have no doubt not been properly disposed of. Parents and all can be quite a fickle thing.

I'd like to know if there'd be anything worth doing to appease the potentially pissed demons I offed all those years ago. I know I left the religion previously under strange circumstances, and I'd like to get back to the swing of things, hopefully under better standards and graces than I currently believe I'm in now.

Also, While I was in deep thought, I came up with an arguement about Satan, that I'd like input on. I've never been able to properly meditate given any instance of which I have tried. There have been many methods which I've practiced, all not seeming to work. Using this idea to strive for a goal, I belittled myself that Satan will not (Reward) me with love until I overcome this goal. While a part of me believes that I will still feel his presence and love, despite not progressing towards this goal, which would defeat the purpose of growing stronger as an individual, which also defeats a key purpose of Satanism, growing stronger as one.

What I'm trying to say is, depite all the shit I've pulled in my unmature years of then and now, will Satan continue to love me? All the reward I've ever wanted was something that akin to a father figure, there to hold my hand and baby me like a child. I didn't grow up with such a parental figure, and part of my innocent childhood lingers in the past, which subsequentally holds a large portion of my personality. I'm not afraid to admit that I've been babied my entire life. Never by my father, though.
Sorry for the confused questions, even I'm not sure what I mean. I just want to be loved while striving for goals that are possible. Though despite the years, I've yet to get into a deep meditative stance........