Other #77466 Can you help me?

[AskSatanOperator]

I can't find a job, so I can't find love too.

Girl isn't loyal to me, it's loyal to security, money and stability, not me.
I'm scared she can betray me, and I'm ready to delete her, cut and crush ice cold. I think I'm losing ability to love.

I often fantasize about kidnapping a girl to force her to be with me, I also fantasize on brainwashing her or deleting her.
While I fantasize about it, it feels painful and empty underline, while we pretend to be happy. Emptiness and pain at least feels real.

I even did this alone, basically I think I'm schizophrenic to some degree, and it feel even more painful and empty knowing it's not even a real person I'm talking to.

I tried to apply to multiple jobs, I don't know what to do. This just for basic income at least. I still need a way to become rich and I don't know.

I feel trapped, and violence feel like happyness, only thing that makes sense. I feel bloodlust on many things and hate these so much, hate when people mocks. I'm watching also gore, it makes me feel lighter, and it feels real.

World is wild jungle.

 

[Ayleth]

'Bloodlust' and all those things are your manifestations of base chakra. You don't like the condition you're in so it pushes you to do action, mental-wise you understand this by what you told above.

Think how to use this drive to become successful. Have a proper routine, do physical exercise, continue applying to jobs. Stabilise yourself and clean your aura. Do AoP every day.

Women are loyal to you seeing it is YOU who achieved this, not some money or security that fell from the sky.

 

[BrightSpace666]

You can only become truly rich by nurturing the one who provides your source: your soul. Phrases like "the world is cruel", "the world is wild jungle" and similar platitude are meaningless; they won't solve your problems. Get your world in order so that you can see the external world through your own world. The issues you've outlined can be addressed and restored through meditation/magic.

Sieg Heil!

 

[Engineered Trasformation]

violence feel like happyness, only thing that makes sense.

Man, I feel a bit worried for you, even if I do not know you - but I seem to know the schemes your mind is going through.

First thing I want to tell you : do not feel guilty, or the cause of your problems. It is, that problems are somehow inside you, like a virus is inside a computer but... the problem is not the computer itself. So you may need to fix some damages in your Soul, leading to problems, but it's not you the problem. Forget this.
It's not your fault.
Second, I see many red flags for abuse, violence or mistreatment you may have suffered : the mind is able to delete and suppress conscious memories of this. So you may not remember the facts, but emotional memories are alive, they are stores in some areas of the brain, like Amigdala gland and the such.

In short, perceiving the violence is "good" may originate from violence you had to endure, possibly from caregivers. If a child is suffering violence, his mind may slowly be programmed to think that violence is the only form of love, because people who are supposed to give love and care (caregivers) give violence instead, mixed with sporadic "love". So the two concepts blend, and the kid grows with the inner idea that violence = love, or at least is a form to force love or affection, like you do.
When you wonder to tie, brainwash, and subdue a woman, you seem applying the basic treatment an abused child received. This is a huge red flag in your words.

So you are probably not schizophrenic, but you may have PTSD that leads to personality split instead. It's like there are other "selves" in you, buried and with a sort of will and thinking ability, leading to thoughts you do not recognize as "your" because you always repressed those ideas, to avoid confronting past suffering. Those selves may sometimes take over your thinking process, especially when you main self (ego) is low, like in case you are jobless and feel down.

It seems, this is coming to the surface now, to the conscious memory. This may bring back past memories and painful experiences you did not remember before.
If this is the case (I say "if" but it seems pretty evident to me), be strong and prepared to face facts you did not want to remember, flashbacks, emotional outbursts. Nothing your GD cannot handle : they can stop the flood of memories, in case they are too painful. I know this by direct experience.

I can relate much of this because I have this in myself, I experienced and lived those fact, and I still am.
But I can't know you in deep, so I always and strongly suggest to question your Guardian Demon, asking for an explicit and clear answer - if you suffered heavy traumas or abuse, leading to this situation.
If the answer is "yes" you will need to ask for guidance step by step through a Demon, to heal the wounds, slowly and firmly. Only the Demons may read in your mind and know the details, so they can guide you to life experiences that will heal the wounds, even if you still do not remember - a Demon knows.

Plus, of course, intense meditation, cleaning and reprogramming in parallel. I think you know what to do here, but you may not know how to behave in practical life, that your GD will show you - as he did with me.

If you suffered heavy traumas, I express my emotional support to you. I know what it means. You are not alone in this. Never.
Don't feel trapped or hopeless, as this often comes from a wounded self feeling this way, inside you.

 

[Engineered Trasformation]

I just forgot, whatever happened to you, or you remember, etc. feel free to share on here or to me if you wish.
Being listened and understood is priceless here, and I will do that if you wish.

 

[Edward Lonsa]

Greetings!

I often fantasize about kidnapping a girl to force her to be with me, I also fantasize on brainwashing her or deleting her.

What you wrote in your OP does not show that you have no woman or have no money (since you use something to write with, you have a device and the internet and bread for your hands to not shake while writing etc.) at all. What it completely shows is that you do not deserve it. You fantasize of being a rapist and you wonder why you "do not have" something in your life which you DO have, while an actual rapist does not deserve even a life, nor even a painless quick death.

Lets analyze what you wrote. You say you have a perfect woman you do not complain on except you are "afraid" probably completely unbased that she might or will be cheating you which you never had any proof of nor will ever have apparently. Then you complain that this woman needs security. Well, sorry for breaking the laws of jungle on you: this is a very essence of being a woman. This is nothing she has power over, this is what woman physically is whether she wants it or not: a frail horribly attractive sex bomb to be protected or she will get kidnapped and raped - and you own speech shows it to its core. If she is perfect wife (not to count any unbased paranoia) isn't this just logical to expect her husband to guard her at least for his own interest of proceeding to own her?

Ask-Satan is a good invention in a way that, for one it provides full confidentiality, while in the same time, it somehow succeeds in the revealing the true face: enjoying guaranteed privacy people open their true colors and natures. While when people give info of their sufferings it might be completely unendurable to read, some people might say things that would show themselves for what they really are and how certain problems are to be really solved.

21 century's most horrific problem is consumer mentality: while in all best centuries this was mocked at and considered the worst trait, now it is not even called for: what I see people ask is "how to get this" "how to get that". They never ask for example "how to become better person" or "how to better serve mankind". You will read much more about the wrongs they got from others rather than those they did themselves. In astrology section you would rather see questions like "I have this and that what problems might I face" or "how to free from this" instead of "I have this and that, what problems might I cause to others" and "how to make a better use for humanity out of this". They have mentality of just receiving and getting away with everything.

Those who deserve a job are those who wish to use it to give something good to mankind via it, not to get money or fame out of it. Those who deserve a woman are those who wish to make her and her family happy, not to use her for their own ends.

What you say demonstrates that you actually have much much more than what you should have based on your logic. Your question must have been not "how to get more" but "how to deserve more" if you are that ambitious. Which I fully answer: instead of trying to find a way to get money try to find a way to better serve humanity via profession. Instead of trying to find a way to tie an innocent (and create the exact karma described at Engineered Transformation's post) try to find a way to give her better protection and care that would naturally and in a deserved way tie her to you. Instead of asking us "what a wife is she for me" ask yourself "what a husband am I to her" and try to improve it, at least to cleanse unbased paranoia so insultive to a chaste woman. Instead of asking "what is she doing when coming late from job" ask yourself "what am I doing to provide for her when she is working late hours providing for me".

If you answer honestly all these questions to yourself, you will not suffer from "the world not being plated to you" anymore. Instead you will learn to deserve at least 1 million part of what you now demand and learn its real value. Or at least to give things to this world for free yourself and to make this world 1 million part of an inch better which is far more important than to "get something" out of it.

I feel trapped, and violence feel like happyness, only thing that makes sense. I feel bloodlust on many things and hate these so much, hate when people mocks. I'm watching also gore, it makes me feel lighter, and it feels real.

World is wild jungle.

World is what we made it to be. Yours is this one. Think of it.

 

[Recycler1337]

First of all with such symptoms you should realize that you are obliged to visit a doctor and undergo treatment, no one should be put in danger because of your sick head.

In the second place - the girl has nothing to do with it, many people are not loyal and with a man not for his own sake, but for the sake of what he extracts or has by birthright as material goods. But not all, I personally had girls that even helped me financially, or in any other way. It's not a wild jungle, people have empathy and sympathy, if we didn't have it, we would have died as a species long ago.

My opinion you need not a job to begin with, but treatment for the desire for “blood” and thoughts of “murder and rape” if this is of course the real truth and not emotionally written nonsense.

 

[EnkiUK56]

First of all with such symptoms you should realize that you are obliged to visit a doctor and undergo treatment, no one should be put in danger because of your sick head.

In the second place - the girl has nothing to do with it, many people are not loyal and with a man not for his own sake, but for the sake of what he extracts or has by birthright as material goods. But not all, I personally had girls that even helped me financially, or in any other way. It's not a wild jungle, people have empathy and sympathy, if we didn't have it, we would have died as a species long ago.

My opinion you need not a job to begin with, but treatment for the desire for “blood” and thoughts of “murder and rape” if this is of course the real truth and not emotionally written nonsense.

Definitley do not be kidnapping women lol, mental yes.