of the true light
Active member
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2019
- Messages
- 872
Dear Mr. Greenblatt,
I just wanted to thank you for shining a light onto Anti-Semitism because to be honest with you it gives me the most terrible fibromyalgia and my Doctor Dr. Silverstein says that if it is not tackled and completely destroyed that my irritable bowel syndrome will only get worse and worse until one day my bowels will explode like a bombardier beetle all over the wall and oh what a mess that would be! My wife would be so upset to have to clean that up (I can’t even get her to clean the kitchen after a meal) and you don’t know my bowels they can be like a pit bull...sometimes my fecal contents won’t even hold...and this is because the stool is afraid of my intestines you see.
I’ve been keeping track of all my stools as any good boy should and thank YHVH there is no blood but I’m up to 6 releases a day. Do you know what it’s like to have to use the restroom 6 times a day? And that is if I am lucky enough to make it to the bathroom...but at least it exits fast because like I said my bowels scare the crap out of my crap literally and also I’m not getting all my nutrients because I usually try to hold it in as long as I can so that I can but now it runs out of my rectum like a shiksa bimbo in a horror movie and my underwear is the item that she trips on.
I know I am probably just wasting your time but this is serious business and how many others have been so adversely affected by all of this Anti-Semitic Pepe nonsense to the point where their poo is afraid of their intestines too which is why I wrote this letter to say that all Pepe’s should be banned from the interwebs and I know that you are working on that but please work harder Mr. Greenblatt or that silly frog from hell is going to piss off my wife who will have to clean exploded bowel contents off the wall’s of our condo (and you thought the Shoah was bad)!
Let me Shoah you my underwear after witnessing a Pepe in action and you will re-think those horrors and see things in an entirely new light because the smell is so nutty that it could possibly even make one go nutty...but being nutty is OK because like my childhood rabbi taught us pooping is meditation and the results always holy but only if you look really really close because at a distance you can’t really see all of the little holes on the logs granted one is blessed with logs and not brown waters.
I hope you keep track of your stools too Mr. Greenblatt. It’s a very important thing to do almost as important as defeating anti-Semitism which is never acceptable a dank aun zogn zay gezunt meyn fraynd!
Sincerely,
Rabbi Stephen Goldheistovich
I just wanted to thank you for shining a light onto Anti-Semitism because to be honest with you it gives me the most terrible fibromyalgia and my Doctor Dr. Silverstein says that if it is not tackled and completely destroyed that my irritable bowel syndrome will only get worse and worse until one day my bowels will explode like a bombardier beetle all over the wall and oh what a mess that would be! My wife would be so upset to have to clean that up (I can’t even get her to clean the kitchen after a meal) and you don’t know my bowels they can be like a pit bull...sometimes my fecal contents won’t even hold...and this is because the stool is afraid of my intestines you see.
I’ve been keeping track of all my stools as any good boy should and thank YHVH there is no blood but I’m up to 6 releases a day. Do you know what it’s like to have to use the restroom 6 times a day? And that is if I am lucky enough to make it to the bathroom...but at least it exits fast because like I said my bowels scare the crap out of my crap literally and also I’m not getting all my nutrients because I usually try to hold it in as long as I can so that I can but now it runs out of my rectum like a shiksa bimbo in a horror movie and my underwear is the item that she trips on.
I know I am probably just wasting your time but this is serious business and how many others have been so adversely affected by all of this Anti-Semitic Pepe nonsense to the point where their poo is afraid of their intestines too which is why I wrote this letter to say that all Pepe’s should be banned from the interwebs and I know that you are working on that but please work harder Mr. Greenblatt or that silly frog from hell is going to piss off my wife who will have to clean exploded bowel contents off the wall’s of our condo (and you thought the Shoah was bad)!
Let me Shoah you my underwear after witnessing a Pepe in action and you will re-think those horrors and see things in an entirely new light because the smell is so nutty that it could possibly even make one go nutty...but being nutty is OK because like my childhood rabbi taught us pooping is meditation and the results always holy but only if you look really really close because at a distance you can’t really see all of the little holes on the logs granted one is blessed with logs and not brown waters.
I hope you keep track of your stools too Mr. Greenblatt. It’s a very important thing to do almost as important as defeating anti-Semitism which is never acceptable a dank aun zogn zay gezunt meyn fraynd!
Sincerely,
Rabbi Stephen Goldheistovich
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