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I think I made several mistakes, is it reversible? I pushed myself past my limits and I think I accidentally snapped myself out of a light trance.

Tenebris

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Jan 25, 2024
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I skipped my usual routine for the last two days, and I got back on track today.
I did everything as I usually do, only today I switched up the order a little bit, and I did Chakra Cleaning first (Raum mantra 9x reps in each), did Aura Cleaning (Raum mantra 36 reps) and AoP after (Algiz 15x reps). Originally I used to clean my aura first, then the chakras, then the AoP. I keep the reps low on purpose and use shortened vibrations because I used to have a tendency of getting tired and lightheaded quickly while using mantras and runes, I don't have these problems with the adjustments. Well, normally.

Another thing I changed up compared to my normal routine is that during chakra cleaning I included my 6th chakra as well, originally I only cleaned my 3rd eye without touching the 6th.
I had a subtle sense of discomfort and felt a little bit out of breath, but brushed it aside and continued on because I thought it wasn't that serious. I felt extremely overwhelmed like five mins after I finished, I got all shaky and trembled like crazy, and felt like I was seriously sick out of the blue. I almost spiralled into a panic attack because of this.
I sat down and visualised Father Satan's Sigil, and called for him, requesting help. I can't really communicate with the Gods yet, but I calmed down almost immidiately, even before I could explain to him what happened. When I was fine I stayed and meditated upon his Sigil for a longer period of time, it just felt right to do so.
However, I think that I accidentally went into a very light trance state, it's just a speculation and I'm not sure what exactly happened. I meditated with eyes open, my vision got progressively more foggy and blurry, and when it cleared up again the whole room became much more vibrant than before, the lights were extremely strong. The colors were gone, altough I can't really recall everything in a detailed manner because I remained only a few moments in this state. At the same time my body had became numb, especially my nose and the near areas including my mouth, and I couldn't feel when I was inhaling or exhaling. It was kind of similar to depersonalization, when you feel like you're disconnected from your body, and your body does it's own thing automatically on auto-pilot mode, without you controlling anything. It's like being inside your body, and looking out through your own eyes, but having no control over what you do, and when you do it.
It lasted for a few seconds, I got surprised and panicked, and snapped out immidiately. After that I washed my face with cold water, and sat down, trying to calm down once again. I was completely awake and alert immidiately, but the numbness in my mouth/nose area stayed (I was actually focused on my breathing while meditating, so these particular areas as well. I don't know if this detail is important or not). I began to fidget around with my hands in a panicked state, and randomly tapped my thumb against the side of my nostrils, switching up between the right and left side. It gave me an idea, that I should try alternate nostril breathing, I did 5 rounds in total. The weird sensation around my mouth disappeared rather quickly, I can't recall if that's happened after the breathing exercise or before. I know that all of this sounds like the rambling of an insane and foolish person, but I was completely overwhelmed and panicked at that time, and I had no idea what was happening, or why it was happening, and I literally lost the ability to think straight, that is the reason that I did the first thing that randomly popped up in my mind without thinking (please don't laugh at me for that, I know I'm dumb for letting the situation happen in the first place). After the five rounds I laid down to relax, my mind became a little bit calmer than before, but my body was going nuts, my muscles all tensed up, twitching and jerking randomly, etc. Luckily, this disappeared after a while.

About an hour or so passed since all of this happened, I managed to calm down, and be more relaxed than before, but this "numb" sensation around my nose stayed, everything else is fine overall. I feel like the sensation improved a little bit, but it's still not back in it's original state. I can feel if I touch it, I can smell things just fine, but when I inhale or exhale it still feels extremely weird and odd, it's exactly the same how it felt when I was in that depersonalized state, or I don't know how should I call it exactly. I think it was a trance state but I'm not sure. The outside of my nose is completely fine, but the sensation on the inside parts remained.
To tell the truth, these things are probably the most dumb and idiotic stuffs I did so far, and re-reading it made me laugh at myself for being such an idiot for it. When I was done writing halfaway through it popped up in my mind that I vibrated 9x reps of Raum into my 6th chakra to clean it, despite never doing that before.
I did the opening meditation for all of my chakras, altough I didn't really continued working on my 6th chakra, only the third eye and the other chakras. Maybe it was too much for my 6th chakra to receive that much stimulation after a period of time where it wasn't stimulated at all. So maybe that's what caused me to become overwhelmed? I have no idea, but reading it again made me realize that I made some really big mistakes with my routine and workings. I also should've stopped at the very first signs of discomfort, even if they were faint and subtle, instead of pushing myself and waiting for my mind to spiral out of control and become overwhelmed.
Can someone help me with what should I do now, or what caused these things to happen? Can I reverse the damage I caused? Did I just damaged the nerves in my nose, or what happened? If that's the case I really hope that it's reversible, or that I will recover with time. I don't have any other symptoms beside this, my body remained a bit tense though but I think that's somewhat natural regarding the circumstances.
 
So you did some nasal breathing after cleaning your dirty 6th Chakra and now your nose is numb? Have you considered perhaps you don’t feel as much sensation from your nose because your berthing is less laborious now? Would you describe what’s going on as a problem or just strange?

I had a friend of mine do 216 vibrations of RAUM into his solar plexus to try and rapidly awaken it and he described being in agony for several days afterwards but it wasn’t permanent, 9 isn’t that much you didn’t do anything extreme or stupid so don’t beat yourself up.

I enjoy using Surya it’s a gentler cleaner you might want to do that if RAUM is bothering you.
 
You did everything right and nothing weird or extra ordinary happened here.

Satan is there when one is in need of him, that's also proved by your experience here.
The 6th chakra is a very important chakra, as it is also a connector to a lot of chakras. As you cleaned it, energy flowed trough it and trough these paths/nadis, and that's the reason for your vivid experience. You probably have a lot of dross in there. Keep doing this, you'll be fine.
There are minor chakras on the nose which is connected to the 6th chakra, that is probably why you felt numbness there.
 
Don't skip any day of your meditations.
Sooner or later everyone experiences how negative, and sometimes dangerous it can be.

You are aware now of the work you need to do on your sixth chakra.
The sixth chakra is very powerful, you should work on it.

Better to clean your chakras and aura with white-gold energy for a while.
 
Panic attack is the "final stage" of reaction to pressure/stress, mental/psychological. Seeing blurry is a beginning of fainting, a "pre-black out" of the brain.

The Sixth chakra is responsible for these things. Its dysfunction can lead to these types of events, as well as nightmares, neurosis, psychosis, headaches, loss of mental balance, even physical as a side effect.

Keep in mind that during cleansing, these things can surface because of the meditative process, so it is advised not to overdo the work.

If symptoms recur, it is recommended to decrease work. This seems to be due to overwork. In some cases, if you force yourself to work, you may faint, and it seems that you have come close.

In this case, stop the work and resume it when you feel well. Do not force. After these events, most likely, you will not be able to do much, complete your meditation routine, even decreasing the intensity, and rest. This will give the body time to recover.
 
Thanks for the replies and help everyone! It means a lot to me.
A little bit of update, the numbness disappeared by the time I woke up, and I managed to do both my morning and night routine, altough I did less work than I usually do (Only cleaning and AoP, nothing else). The same thing happened again, but it resolved on it's own within a few minutes, and I didn't felt overwhelmed or panicked as I did yesterday.

I think it might be both mental and psychical, it feels a lot like depersonalization, or something similar to it. It felt like as if my psychical body didn't belong to me in a sense, or if my mind and body got disconnected from each other, if that make sense. It happened while I was vibrating mantras, I heard my own voice but it felt a lot like as if my voice didn't belong to me, or as if someone else was talking through me. When it happened again I got surprised, my mind was racing with different thoughts, while my body was just sitting there and continued to vibrate the mantras in a completely calm state by itself, without me controlling anything. Meanwhile, both my nose and mouth areas went completely numb. I actually finished my routine in that state after I calmed myself down a little, and after I was done everything went back into normal within a few minutes. I didn't experienced discomfort this time, luckily.

Reading the replies it became clear to me, that I did overwork myself, which I thought wouldn't happen because I kept the reps really low, and used shortened vibrations, so I only handled small amounts of energy. I also believed that skipping one or two days won't affect me for the same reasons, which isn't the case at all. I never knew that cleaning out dross can cause such side effects, the only thing I experienced was heat in my body after cleanings, felt like as if I was leaning into a campfire, but that's all.
It's all makes sense now, I actually struggled a lot with my mental health for the majority of my life, no wonder that cleaning out the dross from my 6th chakra resulted in these experiences. I already feel better than I did yesterday, but I think I won't use runes or mantras for a while, and stick to vizualizing white-golden light instead. I'II also be careful not to overwork again, and to never skip even a day, I don't want to repeat my mistakes once again.
Again, thank you to everyone who replied and helped me, I'm a lot better and also learned many valuable things.
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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