beareroflightandtrth83
Member
- Joined
- Dec 9, 2019
- Messages
- 134
Okay. I have a LOT to say on my mind. It is like a flood of inspiration to read certain pdf free books from the JoS website REALLY touched me on a personal level, almost as if a message is being delivered and made me realize how SATAN has been in my life!
First, I want to start somewhere. I am 36 years old now. Yes I have made a LOT of mistakes now and back then when I was young. I struggled and still do occasionally. One thing I realized, the enemy hated my guts and still hates me hahaha, I was unable to be programmed when my parents forced me to go to church and for me to become a "Christian". I have do have a gentile soul more than I thought. I was born with talents only a gentile soul would have, art, martial arts, empathy, etc. I truly am blessed. But when I was younger, even though I thought of myself as a "boy", I rebelled against the bible at a young age especially when I was told that because I was a "girl" and that I was suppose to obey men as if they are kings etc and I knew in my heart, "whatever! I aint no girl" mentality and wanted to prove to others my strength physically, as well as mentally and spiritually, biologically I am female but since I still identify as a guy, I feel an integrating of my soul, aspects.
Because of this, identity thing of mine at a young age, my parents, especially mom thought there was something wrong with me (she didn't know at the time) so I went to all these doctors, to get labeled with mental illnesses like schizophrenia, manic depressive, bipolar, and then now days when I go to a counselor which I stopped going now I am told I don't have any of those things, I just have "gender dysphoria". So as the serman said that welfare and those with "disabilities" are relying on the jewish programs, benefits where you are completely dependent on the state, now I can see why if I did go through the transition physically for being trans. that really would fuck things up, I wisened up fast. It's funny me and my mom got dreams of a warning about it. (does Satan really try to reach to us through our Christianized people like my mom and myself?) I got so fed up with the shit, and realized the truth, I quit but the story relates to my younger years, my mom was my representative payee, I ended up getting disability benefits. She encouraged it. Now in her older years she regrets a lot of things she done and I can see Satan working on "her". She still struggles to awaken. She changed over the years. I wasn't encouraged to get a job when I was younger, I was told I would lose benefits,etc feared to live in poverty, I suffered severe depression when I graduated from high school living on welfare, I felt unwanted, unloved, especially my first relationship was unrequited love, I tried to commit suicide. I got so fed up, I turned to Satan, my mind was hungry for the truth, for change, the one thing that got me through all of this madness was Satan, I fought back against attacks, curses and the enemy.
In 2003 I dedicated my soul to Satan, I read a sermon just now on the thing about welfare and communism and the effects it has psychologically. I was so touched by it! I left home three years ago to move to florida I was given a lot of job opportunity. I have amazing potential, I have a lot of intelligence more than I thought and those I work for, love my work. I was scarred by first job at (Walmart) was fired for gossip that wasn't even true. I work at a place now that I love. I continue to make strides in my development, health and spiritual health as well. I been through a lot to get where I am at. I'll never forget all that I went through,
I know one thing for sure, I am definitely a fighter, stubborn and when I look back at my life. I truly see Satan has been present. Sometimes I don't always see but I do now. It's pretty clear that Satan definitely has a path destined for me, and another one is, obviously when it comes to relationships, someone he has in mind that probably will help me further along.
Satan definitely looks out for his own, even when one doesn't think so or don't "feel" him. And you know something when I dedicated my soul to Satan (as Enki), I recall him telling me in a dream I had, about calling me "marduk" I knew it was allegorical, I didn't even know who that was but when I read he was Amon Ra and read that his animal was a lion and red and gold his colors. I had an imaginary friend as a kid, who was a "lion" named simba, lions are a favorite of mine, and always will be. I almost enjoy the colors red and gold. His zodiac position is Taurus (I was born a Taurus). So I don't know if he is my primary guardian or not. I still haven't figured that out, still unsure about my GD.
My point is amazing things happened to me, look back. I truly know where I belong, that is why I always come back here because in my heart I KNOW the truth, it was Satan who set me right on my path. We aren't alone, I am not alone. I am honorably grateful to this day. Now that I know he has a hand in my life, I don't think I should be worrying about stupid shit anymore because things happen to me that teaches me a lesson. I am not saying to take no responsibility or work towards something, I am just saying having faith that I am aided helps in my endeavors really sets one right on the path. I know this will happen as well when it comes to relationships whether they are romantic or not and that's another challenge I will have to work on but I Know im on the right path.
All I am going to say HAIL SATAN. And I want to say thanks to all the Clergy who put the effort into their sermons, trust me, we are reading it, and it is touching our lives, at least mine. I am honestly humbled by the wisdom put into the sermons to guide us. So thank you.
First, I want to start somewhere. I am 36 years old now. Yes I have made a LOT of mistakes now and back then when I was young. I struggled and still do occasionally. One thing I realized, the enemy hated my guts and still hates me hahaha, I was unable to be programmed when my parents forced me to go to church and for me to become a "Christian". I have do have a gentile soul more than I thought. I was born with talents only a gentile soul would have, art, martial arts, empathy, etc. I truly am blessed. But when I was younger, even though I thought of myself as a "boy", I rebelled against the bible at a young age especially when I was told that because I was a "girl" and that I was suppose to obey men as if they are kings etc and I knew in my heart, "whatever! I aint no girl" mentality and wanted to prove to others my strength physically, as well as mentally and spiritually, biologically I am female but since I still identify as a guy, I feel an integrating of my soul, aspects.
Because of this, identity thing of mine at a young age, my parents, especially mom thought there was something wrong with me (she didn't know at the time) so I went to all these doctors, to get labeled with mental illnesses like schizophrenia, manic depressive, bipolar, and then now days when I go to a counselor which I stopped going now I am told I don't have any of those things, I just have "gender dysphoria". So as the serman said that welfare and those with "disabilities" are relying on the jewish programs, benefits where you are completely dependent on the state, now I can see why if I did go through the transition physically for being trans. that really would fuck things up, I wisened up fast. It's funny me and my mom got dreams of a warning about it. (does Satan really try to reach to us through our Christianized people like my mom and myself?) I got so fed up with the shit, and realized the truth, I quit but the story relates to my younger years, my mom was my representative payee, I ended up getting disability benefits. She encouraged it. Now in her older years she regrets a lot of things she done and I can see Satan working on "her". She still struggles to awaken. She changed over the years. I wasn't encouraged to get a job when I was younger, I was told I would lose benefits,etc feared to live in poverty, I suffered severe depression when I graduated from high school living on welfare, I felt unwanted, unloved, especially my first relationship was unrequited love, I tried to commit suicide. I got so fed up, I turned to Satan, my mind was hungry for the truth, for change, the one thing that got me through all of this madness was Satan, I fought back against attacks, curses and the enemy.
In 2003 I dedicated my soul to Satan, I read a sermon just now on the thing about welfare and communism and the effects it has psychologically. I was so touched by it! I left home three years ago to move to florida I was given a lot of job opportunity. I have amazing potential, I have a lot of intelligence more than I thought and those I work for, love my work. I was scarred by first job at (Walmart) was fired for gossip that wasn't even true. I work at a place now that I love. I continue to make strides in my development, health and spiritual health as well. I been through a lot to get where I am at. I'll never forget all that I went through,
I know one thing for sure, I am definitely a fighter, stubborn and when I look back at my life. I truly see Satan has been present. Sometimes I don't always see but I do now. It's pretty clear that Satan definitely has a path destined for me, and another one is, obviously when it comes to relationships, someone he has in mind that probably will help me further along.
Satan definitely looks out for his own, even when one doesn't think so or don't "feel" him. And you know something when I dedicated my soul to Satan (as Enki), I recall him telling me in a dream I had, about calling me "marduk" I knew it was allegorical, I didn't even know who that was but when I read he was Amon Ra and read that his animal was a lion and red and gold his colors. I had an imaginary friend as a kid, who was a "lion" named simba, lions are a favorite of mine, and always will be. I almost enjoy the colors red and gold. His zodiac position is Taurus (I was born a Taurus). So I don't know if he is my primary guardian or not. I still haven't figured that out, still unsure about my GD.
My point is amazing things happened to me, look back. I truly know where I belong, that is why I always come back here because in my heart I KNOW the truth, it was Satan who set me right on my path. We aren't alone, I am not alone. I am honorably grateful to this day. Now that I know he has a hand in my life, I don't think I should be worrying about stupid shit anymore because things happen to me that teaches me a lesson. I am not saying to take no responsibility or work towards something, I am just saying having faith that I am aided helps in my endeavors really sets one right on the path. I know this will happen as well when it comes to relationships whether they are romantic or not and that's another challenge I will have to work on but I Know im on the right path.
All I am going to say HAIL SATAN. And I want to say thanks to all the Clergy who put the effort into their sermons, trust me, we are reading it, and it is touching our lives, at least mine. I am honestly humbled by the wisdom put into the sermons to guide us. So thank you.
