Hey, I need some help.

[benf406]

Right now I'm not in the right mind so this is going to be all over the place, sorry.
Okay I should start by saying that I haven't even thought about Satan for probably a year now, I started to slip into a pit of laziness, over-eating junk, procrastination etc. I've managed to stay caught up on politics, philosophy and some tv shows but that's about it.
Anyway I've subconsciously known that I've been going down the wrong tracks all this time but I've just always been an inch away from snapping out of it, today is my worst day but for basically no reason, I have a friend who I used to be attracted to or maybe still am I'm not sure but my friend doesn't roll the way I roll if you know what I mean so we just talked a few days a week as friends and we got to be really good friends, I even bought him/her a cool t shirt, problem is we never go out and I'm a very social person I need to be with people and do stuff if I'm not everything is 100x worse and seeing as most of my friends have gone into the army including my best friend this guy/girl is the only one I've got left that I can possibly see regularly unless I want to go talk to basically strangers.
Anyway long story short this friend has gradually become more and more of an asshole and recently asked me if I wanted to go out and I said yes obviously but then they cancelled last minute claiming they were sick but couldn't tell me what they were sick of..
So I was fed up with him/her, I don't want to be dependant on this one dude(ette) to get my 'social fix' so I've stopped talking to them and he/she hasn't even noticed because they never initiate conversation, I've trusted this person with so much information that I'm starting to think the entire friendship was in my head, now I'm even more dependant I check to see if they've messaged me every 10 minutes, I have no control anymore and I'm lonely as fuck even though I shouldn't be, I used to be able to go out with loads of friends whenever I wanted and have a great time but not anymore, what should I do about this friend? It's not even a big deal I'm just obsessed with it because I have nothing else..
Truthfully I'm a wreck that sits on a computer all day watching youtube videos, occasionally doing something productive.I need a job and told myself I would write a cv 6 days ago... I haven't bothered.No-one knows I'm this bad, not even my mum because I put on a front and act like I know what I'm doing but I don't even know how to formulate any speck of motivation, I'm sinking into de-realization and I know I have so much potential that's going to be wasted because I just can't fucking do what I know I need to do.
Even my back and ass hurts because I sit down all the time but I have no other choice, what am I gonna do walk around my house aimlessly?
I'm completely lost in life and just blerrrrhggghh.And no anything to the tune of "just do it" isn't going to help if I could just do it then I'd fucking do all the stuff I need to do, what's wrong with me?
I know this isn't directly related to Satan so I'm sorry about that but I trust the people in here to give me guidance after all you guys have a lot of motivation to meditate etc everyday.

 

[Sandra Waldron]

At the risk of sounding insensitive, have you ever heard of the term "wallowing in pity"? Because that is exactly what you are doing. Part of you "wants" to be where you are, which is in a deep rut, or else you would find the fire to pull yourself out of it. No one else is going to do it for you!

Of course, you could have some chemical imbalance in your brain. However, I think you want to be pitied. Otherwise, you wouldn't have gone to such great lengths to write such a long post.

Hail Satan!



On Friday, March 7, 2014 5:51 AM, "benf406@..." <benf406@... wrote:
  Right now I'm not in the right mind so this is going to be all over the place, sorry.
Okay I should start by saying that I haven't even thought about Satan for probably a year now, I started to slip into a pit of laziness, over-eating junk, procrastination etc. I've managed to stay caught up on politics, philosophy and some tv shows but that's about it.
Anyway I've subconsciously known that I've been going down the wrong tracks all this time but I've just always been an inch away from snapping out of it, today is my worst day but for basically no reason, I have a friend who I used to be attracted to or maybe still am I'm not sure but my friend doesn't roll the way I roll if you know what I mean so we just talked a few days a week as friends and we got to be really good friends, I even bought him/her a cool t shirt, problem is we never go out and I'm a very social person I need to be with people and do stuff if I'm not everything is 100x worse and seeing as most of my friends have gone into the army including my best friend this guy/girl is the only one I've got left that I can possibly see regularly unless I want to go talk to basically strangers.
Anyway long story short this friend has gradually become more and more of an asshole and recently asked me if I wanted to go out and I said yes obviously but then they cancelled last minute claiming they were sick but couldn't tell me what they were sick of..
So I was fed up with him/her, I don't want to be dependant on this one dude(ette) to get my 'social fix' so I've stopped talking to them and he/she hasn't even noticed because they never initiate conversation, I've trusted this person with so much information that I'm starting to think the entire friendship was in my head, now I'm even more dependant I check to see if they've messaged me every 10 minutes, I have no control anymore and I'm lonely as fuck even though I shouldn't be, I used to be able to go out with loads of friends whenever I wanted and have a great time but not anymore, what should I do about this friend? It's not even a big deal I'm just obsessed with it because I have nothing else..
Truthfully I'm a wreck that sits on a computer all day watching youtube videos, occasionally doing something productive.I need a job and told myself I would write a cv 6 days ago... I haven't bothered.No-one knows I'm this bad, not even my mum because I put on a front and act like I know what I'm doing but I don't even know how to formulate any speck of motivation, I'm sinking into de-realization and I know I have so much potential that's going to be wasted because I just can't fucking do what I know I need to do.
Even my back and ass hurts because I sit down all the time but I have no other choice, what am I gonna do walk around my house aimlessly?
I'm completely lost in life and just blerrrrhggghh.And no anything to the tune of "just do it" isn't going to help if I could just do it then I'd fucking do all the stuff I need to do, what's wrong with me?
I know this isn't directly related to Satan so I'm sorry about that but I trust the people in here to give me guidance after all you guys have a lot of motivation to meditate etc everyday.

 

[Lamont Green]

Use the algiz rune in multiples of 15 and affirm "the power of algiz is protecting me from negitive energy"
It sounds simple, but its effective. I was in the same rut and couldnt meditate. This rune made my mind clear and focused on the here and now.

On Mar 9, 2014 3:44 PM, "Sandra Waldron" <simsmotal@... wrote:

At the risk of sounding insensitive, have you ever heard of the term "wallowing in pity"? Because that is exactly what you are doing. Part of you "wants" to be where you are, which is in a deep rut, or else you would find the fire to pull yourself out of it. No one else is going to do it for you!

Of course, you could have some chemical imbalance in your brain. However, I think you want to be pitied. Otherwise, you wouldn't have gone to such great lengths to write such a long post.

Hail Satan!



On Friday, March 7, 2014 5:51 AM, "benf406@..." <benf406@... wrote:
  Right now I'm not in the right mind so this is going to be all over the place, sorry.
Okay I should start by saying that I haven't even thought about Satan for probably a year now, I started to slip into a pit of laziness, over-eating junk, procrastination etc. I've managed to stay caught up on politics, philosophy and some tv shows but that's about it.
Anyway I've subconsciously known that I've been going down the wrong tracks all this time but I've just always been an inch away from snapping out of it, today is my worst day but for basically no reason, I have a friend who I used to be attracted to or maybe still am I'm not sure but my friend doesn't roll the way I roll if you know what I mean so we just talked a few days a week as friends and we got to be really good friends, I even bought him/her a cool t shirt, problem is we never go out and I'm a very social person I need to be with people and do stuff if I'm not everything is 100x worse and seeing as most of my friends have gone into the army including my best friend this guy/girl is the only one I've got left that I can possibly see regularly unless I want to go talk to basically strangers.
Anyway long story short this friend has gradually become more and more of an asshole and recently asked me if I wanted to go out and I said yes obviously but then they cancelled last minute claiming they were sick but couldn't tell me what they were sick of..
So I was fed up with him/her, I don't want to be dependant on this one dude(ette) to get my 'social fix' so I've stopped talking to them and he/she hasn't even noticed because they never initiate conversation, I've trusted this person with so much information that I'm starting to think the entire friendship was in my head, now I'm even more dependant I check to see if they've messaged me every 10 minutes, I have no control anymore and I'm lonely as fuck even though I shouldn't be, I used to be able to go out with loads of friends whenever I wanted and have a great time but not anymore, what should I do about this friend? It's not even a big deal I'm just obsessed with it because I have nothing else..
Truthfully I'm a wreck that sits on a computer all day watching youtube videos, occasionally doing something productive.I need a job and told myself I would write a cv 6 days ago... I haven't bothered. No-one knows I'm this bad, not even my mum because I put on a front and act like I know what I'm doing but I don't even know how to formulate any speck of motivation, I'm sinking into de-realization and I know I have so much potential that's going to be wasted because I just can't fucking do what I know I need to do.
Even my back and ass hurts because I sit down all the time but I have no other choice, what am I gonna do walk around my house aimlessly?
I'm completely lost in life and just blerrrrhggghh.And no anything to the tune of "just do it" isn't going to help if I could just do it then I'd fucking do all the stuff I need to do, what's wrong with me?
I know this isn't directly related to Satan so I'm sorry about that but I trust the people in here to give me guidance after all you guys have a lot of motivation to meditate etc everyday.

 

[Plebia Gapit]

Hi there, have you done meditating? Or dedication? Bcuz if you did this it will change your life to be better than before you will feel completed. Read joyofsatan and start empowering yourself you will not be bored you will get positive attitude. Take down notes make black book. Before and after. As time goes by you will feel life is better and happy no worries.?

On Friday, March 7, 2014, <benf406@... wrote:

  Right now I'm not in the right mind so this is going to be all over the place, sorry.
Okay I should start by saying that I haven't even thought about Satan for probably a year now, I started to slip into a pit of laziness, over-eating junk, procrastination etc. I've managed to stay caught up on politics, philosophy and some tv shows but that's about it.
Anyway I've subconsciously known that I've been going down the wrong tracks all this time but I've just always been an inch away from snapping out of it, today is my worst day but for basically no reason, I have a friend who I used to be attracted to or maybe still am I'm not sure but my friend doesn't roll the way I roll if you know what I mean so we just talked a few days a week as friends and we got to be really good friends, I even bought him/her a cool t shirt, problem is we never go out and I'm a very social person I need to be with people and do stuff if I'm not everything is 100x worse and seeing as most of my friends have gone into the army including my best friend this guy/girl is the only one I've got left that I can possibly see regularly unless I want to go talk to basically strangers.
Anyway long story short this friend has gradually become more and more of an asshole and recently asked me if I wanted to go out and I said yes obviously but then they cancelled last minute claiming they were sick but couldn't tell me what they were sick of..
So I was fed up with him/her, I don't want to be dependant on this one dude(ette) to get my 'social fix' so I've stopped talking to them and he/she hasn't even noticed because they never initiate conversation, I've trusted this person with so much information that I'm starting to think the entire friendship was in my head, now I'm even more dependant I check to see if they've messaged me every 10 minutes, I have no control anymore and I'm lonely as fuck even though I shouldn't be, I used to be able to go out with loads of friends whenever I wanted and have a great time but not anymore, what should I do about this friend? It's not even a big deal I'm just obsessed with it because I have nothing else..
Truthfully I'm a wreck that sits on a computer all day watching youtube videos, occasionally doing something productive.I need a job and told myself I would write a cv 6 days ago... I haven't bothered. No-one knows I'm this bad, not even my mum because I put on a front and act like I know what I'm doing but I don't even know how to formulate any speck of motivation, I'm sinking into de-realization and I know I have so much potential that's going to be wasted because I just can't fucking do what I know I need to do.
Even my back and ass hurts because I sit down all the time but I have no other choice, what am I gonna do walk around my house aimlessly?
I'm completely lost in life and just blerrrrhggghh. And no anything to the tune of "just do it" isn't going to help if I could just do it then I'd fucking do all the stuff I need to do, what's wrong with me?
I know this isn't directly related to Satan so I'm sorry about that but I trust the people in here to give me guidance after all you guys have a lot of motivation to meditate etc everyday.

 

[benf406]

That's very true, I have no worries and I'm comfortable in a sense but I still feel like I'm stuck in the mud, I spend all my time thinking about what I should be doing or how I could do something but just can never actually do it and it feels like it's not a conscious decision, but what you said makes perfect sense I wrote this because I was annoyed at my friend who wasn't even being a dick and because I was annoyed or uncomfortable with my environment I was motivated to do something or seek help.
The problem I have now is if the lights stay on and the food keeps appearing in the kitchen on behalf of my mum will I ever be able to get that motivation/snap out of it and do something?
Thank you by the way this opened my eyes a little bit.

 

[laura vanderboobin]

wel im sorrry to hear that but i dont know what to tell you i dontwant to give you wrong advice


On Monday, March 10, 2014 1:15 AM, Lamont Green <lamontgreen87@... wrote:
  Use the algiz rune in multiples of 15 and affirm "the power of algiz is protecting me from negitive energy"
It sounds simple, but its effective. I was in the same rut and couldnt meditate. This rune made my mind clear and focused on the here and now.

On Mar 9, 2014 3:44 PM, "Sandra Waldron" <simsmotal@... wrote:

At the risk of sounding insensitive, have you ever heard of the term "wallowing in pity"? Because that is exactly what you are doing. Part of you "wants" to be where you are, which is in a deep rut, or else you would find the fire to pull yourself out of it. No one else is going to do it for you!

Of course, you could have some chemical imbalance in your brain. However, I think you want to be pitied. Otherwise, you wouldn't have gone to such great lengths to write such a long post.

Hail Satan!



On Friday, March 7, 2014 5:51 AM, "benf406@..." <benf406@... wrote:
  Right now I'm not in the right mind so this is going to be all over the place, sorry.
Okay I should start by saying that I haven't even thought about Satan for probably a year now, I started to slip into a pit of laziness, over-eating junk, procrastination etc. I've managed to stay caught up on politics, philosophy and some tv shows but that's about it.
Anyway I've subconsciously known that I've been going down the wrong tracks all this time but I've just always been an inch away from snapping out of it, today is my worst day but for basically no reason, I have a friend who I used to be attracted to or maybe still am I'm not sure but my friend doesn't roll the way I roll if you know what I mean so we just talked a few days a week as friends and we got to be really good friends, I even bought him/her a cool t shirt, problem is we never go out and I'm a very social person I need to be with people and do stuff if I'm not everything is 100x worse and seeing as most of my friends have gone into the army including my best friend this guy/girl is the only one I've got left that I can possibly see regularly unless I want to go talk to basically strangers.
Anyway long story short this friend has gradually become more and more of an asshole and recently asked me if I wanted to go out and I said yes obviously but then they cancelled last minute claiming they were sick but couldn't tell me what they were sick of..
So I was fed up with him/her, I don't want to be dependant on this one dude(ette) to get my 'social fix' so I've stopped talking to them and he/she hasn't even noticed because they never initiate conversation, I've trusted this person with so much information that I'm starting to think the entire friendship was in my head, now I'm even more dependant I check to see if they've messaged me every 10 minutes, I have no control anymore and I'm lonely as fuck even though I shouldn't be, I used to be able to go out with loads of friends whenever I wanted and have a great time but not anymore, what should I do about this friend? It's not even a big deal I'm just obsessed with it because I have nothing else..
Truthfully I'm a wreck that sits on a computer all day watching youtube videos, occasionally doing something productive.I need a job and told myself I would write a cv 6 days ago... I haven't bothered. No-one knows I'm this bad, not even my mum because I put on a front and act like I know what I'm doing but I don't even know how to formulate any speck of motivation, I'm sinking into de-realization and I know I have so much potential that's going to be wasted because I just can't fucking do what I know I need to do.
Even my back and ass hurts because I sit down all the time but I have no other choice, what am I gonna do walk around my house aimlessly?
I'm completely lost in life and just blerrrrhggghh.And no anything to the tune of "just do it" isn't going to help if I could just do it then I'd fucking do all the stuff I need to do, what's wrong with me?
I know this isn't directly related to Satan so I'm sorry about that but I trust the people in here to give me guidance after all you guys have a lot of motivation to meditate etc everyday.

 

[krystinah]

<td val[/IMG]You should try kriya

Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPhone [/TD]

From: benf406@... <benf406@...;
To: <[email protected];
Subject: Re: [JoyofSatan666] Hey, I need some help.
Sent: Mon, Mar 10, 2014 4:28:30 AM

<td val[/IMG]   That's very true, I have no worries and I'm comfortable in a sense but I still feel like I'm stuck in the mud, I spend all my time thinking about what I should be doing or how I could do something but just can never actually do it and it feels like it's not a conscious decision, but what you said makes perfect sense I wrote this because I was annoyed at my friend who wasn't even being a dick and because I was annoyed or uncomfortable with my environment I was motivated to do something or seek help.
The problem I have now is if the lights stay on and the food keeps appearing in the kitchen on behalf of my mum will I ever be able to get that motivation/snap out of it and do something?
Thank you by the way this opened my eyes a little bit. [/TD]