Chaka Seal.. Do I even want it gone?

[riskyrabbit19]

I have been seriously pondering the seal that is around my heart chakra. I feel that the reason it is there is because it has been a tool to protect myself.I have a very difficult time trusting people, and I believe if you knew me well you'd understand why. I, like many people I'm sure have had an abusive dad, who did many terrible things to my family and I. He, my brother, as well as many ex-boyfriends and "friends" are pathological liars and to protect myself I have learned to question every little thing I am told. Even my boyfriend, whom I'm deeply in love with has broken my trust with something very miniscule, yet I refuse to let him regain it until I feel he has earned it... I have no idea when that will be, though I think he's learned his lesson.
As a self defence mechanism from lieing and abuse I have litterally built up a wall, and I now know my heart chakra is sealed because of it. When I heard this my immediate reaction was to want to remove it for spiritual advancement, but when I was verbally attacked this morning, for a reason that had nothing to do with me or anything I've done, I began to wonder (even more) if I even want it to be removed. I see others break down just by witnessing the abuse unleashed upon me and I don't know if I want to fully feel these attacks myself. My fear is that if my chakra is unsealed these attacks will really affect me and I don't know if I'm going to be able to cope with them. Believe me, I'm not cold or "heartless" but I have built up a protective berrier that I'm not sure I'm ready to tear down.
This has really been troubling me, and any guidance would be appreciated.
Also, I am very glad that I am now armed with the knowledge of how to unseal it when I am ready.
HAIL SATAN!
HAIL KHIL!
POWER TO THE GODS OF OLD!