I definitely know how you feel, i go through most of the day feeling hatred and negativity from idk what (can't tell if its an enemy or if i'm put through this to learn) but by the end of it i always felt like i've learned something important from going through such torment over time i felt my...
A good way to handle/figure out these emotions is to meditate by staring into a surface (like a carpet) that has lots of ridges (it just looks like random lines and depths) and let your soul paint a picture for you in the terrain (such as beings communicating and/or situations) by learning to...