I wish i could :(. but I'm so scared. I think all day. And feel like a zombie. it was my "best friends" birthday yesterday, and i couldn't even smile. I hate life atm, and being ill just makes me have no energy to try and change it :(.

I have no idea where to start :(. all this seems so hard. The world makes me feel sick, and looking out my window to what we've become makes me feel ill. I just turned to islam wishing for some change in the world. And through reading and learning I didn't feel right. I just felt controlled, and...