Personal story and questions

[occisaraihc]

Hello! Thanks everyone for reading me.
I discovered spiritual satanism and started this journey in 2016.I remember reading the whole site, and doing beginners meditations at that time. I discovered it while I was about to fall in depression, and started taking antidepressants. Also I suffered from anxiety. I tried to commit suicide and blah (i guess the doctor made a mistake in my medication, I wasn't feeling well at all), not that I like talking about that right now. But the thing is: I meditated a lot in that time.

After that, I started a treatment with other doctors and everything went well but took me a lot of years. In that time, I stopped power meditations. I followed my path because I knew I had a long way to recovery. But I did it, mostly therapy and help of pills. This took me 4 years aprox.
I recently re-discovered spiritual satanism by moving my office to my dad's apartment, asking for help in here, after a medium tried to scam me. I dont know why, but it was like my mind unearthed memories and said ASK SATAN FOR HELP.
I started reading the whole site again, there are a lot of new things and I've just started reading like a month ago. I'm happy to have found this place again.

So: I haven't meditated for loooong time but im back again, started a month ago. I remember also not meditating due to anxiety.
I still suffer from anxiety and as I said is a long way to train emotions. I'm on my way, maybe slower than others or at my own pace, but I'm here.

Questions:

1) There are a lot of meditations (like, some chakra meditations or opening the soul meditations), that instructions says "People who have problems with seizures/epilepsy, or who are on psychiatric medications should not perform any of these power meditations, with the exception of void meditation, unless given the ok by their physician"
I'm on mood stabilizer and that may be a thing for life. To tap it off is not an option -remember this is a chemical thing in my brain-. What am I supposed to do? Which meditations? Does it mean I will not be able to open my chakras? What are the risks?

2) not a question but just wanted to share: Two weeks ago I started feeling like the energy meditations was not being useful although I was focused, and I thought it could be my chakras, so I did the chakra alignment and now I'm full of energy happy for that! I hope I can direct it.

3) How to create affirmations correctly? If you want to meditate "for something" (dont know how to say it), you have to create an affirmation in order to direct the energy. So, how to do that? How to be specific?

4) When I was only doing some youtube guided meditations -2019/2020-, there was one that I liked A LOT, about getting to know your spiritual guides and ask for advice or a question. I loved that meditation because it comforted me. I remember the first time I did it, and I visualized as a spiritual guide a beautiful woman, dressed in gold. She gave me beautiful messages when I was feeling tormented or tortured by my mind, or my extreme perfectionism, etc. I felt it was a demon at that moment, how to realize that? How do I know?

5) There is a lot of information in the website, sometimes I feel lost and don't know where to start, I start navigating there, and end up with a hundred tabs opened with every link that I want to read. But I think I must take action. It's a common question: where to start or how to organize? There's A LOT TO DO to grow, and too little time

6) About rune vibration. I started doing that because of the thing in my new office (ritual performed by my dad, the apartment didnt want me here, but you helped me and gave me a banishing ritual and a protection ritual that included rune vibration). I found out the POWER of that, I love it, it raises energy.
I pay attention a lot on how to pronounce every syllable and vibrate it correctly. The question is a little random, maybe someone knows it or maybe not, just curious: is false cord vibration something good here? does it make it better, or it's the same? (vibration of the ventricular folds -fold above the vocal cords/folds-). I knew tibetan monks vibrated mantras with false cords.

Trying to connect everytime I can, my life is a little bit busy because I have 2 jobs, but everytime I can, I read the site and these forums.
hanks everyone, happy to be here again.

 

[Fiery Pluto]

Your tendency to depression can be caused by a strong Neptune in your natal chart. However, Neptune brings spiritual ability. This can result in an advantage in meditation that will be a pleasure and an easy activity for you.

I answer to what i know how to answer.

1) You should stop taking psychiatric medications, gradually reducing the dosage. Your anxiety and depression will disappear/decreasing through void meditation, cleaning meditation, Aura of protection and Hatha Yoga. Then you will try more powerful meditations.

3) Affirmations should always use the present simple, no negation and there should be always "in a positive and healthy manner for me". In this way the energy understands your intention and there won't be any negative effect.

5) Exposing Christianity, Hps Maxine's sermons and Azazel's Astrology are the most important pages for me.

6) You should use the vibration provided by Hps Maxine's audios.

 

[occisaraihc]

Your tendency to depression can be caused by a strong Neptune in your natal chart. However, Neptune brings spiritual ability. This can result in an advantage in meditation that will be a pleasure and an easy activity for you.

I answer to what i know how to answer.

1) You should stop taking psychiatric medications, gradually reducing the dosage. Your anxiety and depression will disappear/decreasing through void meditation, cleaning meditation, Aura of protection and Hatha Yoga. Then you will try more powerful meditations.

3) Affirmations should always use the present simple, no negation and there should be always "in a positive and healthy manner for me". In this way the energy understands your intention and there won't be any negative effect.

5) Exposing Christianity, Hps Maxine's sermons and Azazel's Astrology are the most important pages for me.

6) You should use the vibration provided by Hps Maxine's audios.

Thank you for your answer, its very useful!! How do you know about my natal chart? Thanks!!!