How can I believe in anything after being lied to this much?

[Sero]

I've been lied to about a lot of things since I was born. And at this point, I am a skeptic of everything: Even SS. I have tried to advance time and time again and asked for a sign, tried to talk to Satan, and yet NOTHING. I understand that it takes time, but just how much time does it take? I am starting to question whether any of this is real or not.

I hope no one takes offense to this because I am not trying to be offensive, but truly: How do you know you're not as delusional as anyone that's following the "mainstream" religions you guys despise?

 

[LeydeLuz]

How do you know you're not as delusional as anyone that's following the "mainstream" religions you guys despise?

It's not offensive to us if you ask if you really want the truth. I have asked myself the same thing many times. The best proof that I have had is personal experience, that shows you that it is true and that it is the right path, regardless of what others tell you in favor of Satanism or against it.

 

[Bonedust]

I've been lied to about a lot of things since I was born. And at this point, I am a skeptic of everything: Even SS. I have tried to advance time and time again and asked for a sign, tried to talk to Satan, and yet NOTHING. I understand that it takes time, but just how much time does it take? I am starting to question whether any of this is real or not.

I hope no one takes offense to this because I am not trying to be offensive, but truly: How do you know you're not as delusional as anyone that's following the "mainstream" religions you guys despise?

Hello Sero,

Before i came to Spiritual Satanism, I realized that I never needed to go to a church to look inwards and ask myself existential/spiritual questions. I was already a very spiritually inclined person and I had already experienced (by accident, a few times) sudden entry to the Astral. Over time that has diminished and the ability to do so appears dormant.

However what I saw changed me permanently and I would not stop obsessing over it, as that was the only way for me to cope with the facts presented before me. Because of that experience, I steadily grew a default disdain for "religion" as religion to me at the time was "listening to some imbecile read a book about acting like cannibals" and I thought it was dumb because nature and spirituality was all around me anyways.

Through that mentality, for a time, I would turn to nature for answers and would actually experience bizarre out-of-character scenarios with some animals. I mentioned this frequently to an Elder, who re-iterated that it was because I was "connected" to nature in some way. Through JoS' existence (and through a very specific and deliberate sign I received prior to visiting JoS) I made the conscientious decision to intently worship Satan.

Like you, I frequently contemplate and feel frustration and often lament over my lack of communicative abilities. But none of that has stopped me from participating in scheduled group rituals, praying and performing workings on myself (deep cleaning, protection workings, weight loss, etc etc etc). I continue to struggle with the basics, but I am in no rush and I don't want to get ahead of myself either. I will always continue because I take my dedication/spirituality very seriously. Also yes, I have received a myriad of signs. If i wrote about them I'd end up with a sizable thesis already, mostly because I am very "detail" oriented.

Here, have a freebie (on the house): At my birthday, before blowing the candles on my birthday cake. I made a wish; I desired a hug from Satan or any other demon (I wasn't gonna be picky about it). That night and then two subsequent nights (for a total of three nights in a row) I would sleep and be mildly awoken to a sudden calm and soothing warmth around my chest and shoulders.

Now speaking of signs; I know this was a long time ago (circa 2018) but while I was perusing your posting history, I noticed something odd on your very first topic/thread that I found compatible to (although not to an identical context) a similar scenario where a user posted in a writing style that felt completely out of character to that user. You have received a similar style of writing, but through a different user. It is as if the words that came to you in that post we're of someone else (not the user themselves) who knows you more intimately. Look through their posting history and you will understand what I mean.

From your first topic relating to dedication ritual :
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=2000&p=11796#p11796

Intent is key...what is, is to be. Do not debate with yourself over what is an inane worry, you only work against your intent. That way leads to madness...so with that in mind, move forward and don't look back. That is All.

And this was from a thread of mine from early of last year :
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=16&t=50609

Be calm and relaxed at all times. Patience and perseverance. You are getting there. Show your resolve. You already started walking your path as a Spiritual Satanist. Just keep moving forward. Know this: In every time you meditate, you are improving. The physical result takes time to manifest that's all. Deep trance will follow on how calm and relaxed you are....Least resistance. Do your best!

I do not think it is impossible for the gods to speak through members. I understand any skepticism that comes over this as I am acutely aware that what I am pointing at is potentially a delusion of mine. However I thought that shining some light on your first thread through illuminating these similarities might perhaps reinvigorate your faith in this path.

I hope this helps you understand why faith isn't an issue for some SS. For me, I'm just in an ironic position where I already am consciously aware of its existence (the astral), I am simply closed off, veiled and I know it. An analogy if you will ; I liken myself to someone who has a cast iron pot stuck on their head (this is the veil part), but I can see through a tiny hole and every now and then the pot swivels around violently and (through some profuse swearing and grumbling) I have to constantly adjust it to see through the tiny hole. In this analogy, Spiritual Satanism is the tool I choose to chisel away at the pot and with some patience, freedom!

Hail Satan!

 

[RockSeed13]

I've been lied to about a lot of things since I was born. And at this point, I am a skeptic of everything: Even SS. I have tried to advance time and time again and asked for a sign, tried to talk to Satan, and yet NOTHING. I understand that it takes time, but just how much time does it take? I am starting to question whether any of this is real or not.

I hope no one takes offense to this because I am not trying to be offensive, but truly: How do you know you're not as delusional as anyone that's following the "mainstream" religions you guys despise?

I prayed to Baal (with his sigil) that I wished for my uncle (because his wife kicked him out) to move out of a room so that I could use it for meditations and chanting. After a few weeks, he moved out and went to my aunt's house far away from the house.

The thing is that the gods are always with us, we just can't hear them or see them yet.

 

[Bonedust]

...

Perhaps I may have gone overboard with rambling about myself as a response to your question "How do you know you're not as delusional as anyone that's following the "mainstream" religions you guys despise?". My intent was not to sound as if i was gloating or comparing myself to you (by repeating my life story for the tenth time). But to show you my point of view on why i have faith while simultaneously pointing out what I think was one of the first signs already given to you. You may simply have never noticed. This is all assuming my observations prove to be correct, by the way

Just trying to encourage you.

Hail Satan!