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  • I have to go offline here for about three years because of serious paperwork and system coding and documentation are upon me as I venture into the 3rd and 4th years of tech college. And then that big new job hunt which I do hope I succeed in, I have serious plans to pull off from there like with that weapons research and development job in the computer science department.

    I have seen enough signs that I am still loved despite all the bullshit I did since a screwed past life and this one now, so this should be a good sign for me. I am going to miss all of you my brothers and sisters under hell's blessings.

    Thank you for letting me grow up under your influence JoS. Thank you for rebuilding me.
    A friend told me when he tried to pull me out of my most darkest times are these words, back when I was in an indecisive rut on what I want to choose for a career: Pick one goal and never let any external factor stop you from reaching it.

    In spiritual contexts, I’ve even had the damn enemy try to get me to stop doing fundamental acts that build up to them. They tried to distract me, make me feel bad about it, make it look ugly and put me in many places but know this, it will be the last time and no longer will those enemy entities sway me away from the right discipline to my success ever again.

    I’ve found my long lost reasons once again. Thank you community of warriors under Satan.
    Lesson learned: Never turn your hobbies into your job. Slap me if this is wrong.
    You are right. In psychology class I learned that if you turn something that you have intrinsic motivation(ex: hobby) for into also something that you are extrinsically(ex: earning money for something that was once a hobby) motivated to do, then it will become only be for extrinsic motivation over time(only motivated to do it for money not out of curiosity or pleasure).
    If you find any past cringe and off posts under my name, I would like you to know that I am past that now and have always been sorry for these times of misconduct. I am busy improving myself from all these self-inflicted ruins upon me even if I know it won't be enough. I hope I do a thousand times better than every bullshit I did.
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Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan