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I think I have an emotional problem

SdD

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Apr 30, 2018
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Cover yourself with/in AkAshA…


Ps.: good gif
 
Release your emotions, that’s completely natural, maybe you will feel embarassed to do so, but trust me that it’s a beautiful feeling and is totally natural! Listen to some music you like, I really like Skyrim’s ambience music that’s a suggestion.

Don’t feel weak because of that relationship, rather understand that it was a phase and that it makes you understand more about yourself so you will not be so easily deceived next time.

Post in the forums as many times as you want, we are all brothers and sisters after all and we will help you:)
 
SerLorars13 said:
Hey there.

It is indeed important to not suppress your emotions. Try to let them out and pay attention to them, but don't let them control you. Void meditation helps to stay rational and avoid being controlled by your own emotions and random thoughts/impulses.

Don't overdo it with the final RTR. I'm fairly certain that you are not ready to do 10 a day yet, seeing how you just started properly meditating 3 weeks ago. Doing warfare is awesome and necessary, but it shouldnt be done to a point where you completely overload and drain yourself. Stick to how much you can comfortably handle. Even one or two RTRs a day makes a big impact and will make the Gods proud of you, so don't try to overshoot things right from the get-go.

As for healing yourself mentally and coming into contact with your emotions again, I recommend doing a working with the rune Wunjo. It works well to heal this kind of stuff. Since you are still new, I would recommend doing just a small amount of thorough and powerful vibrations. Don't rush them. As little as 25x or 36x Wunjo will have a noticeable and nice effect as long as you do it properly.

The 30th this month is an awesome date to heal yourself as there are 5 planets in Virgo. Try to start it there during the hours of the Moon, Venus, or Jupiter. You can find the planetary hours for your location here: https://lunarium.co.uk/planets/hours.jsp
(Planetary hours are location-specific so make sure to enter the location closest to you for accuracy).
Also, try to stay focused on your goal from start to finish whenever you do the working. It will help you to see results more quickly.

If anything is unclear or you have more questions, feel free to ask. Good luck :)
 
Hello :)

Keep up your workings, also have you detached from your ex? Don't feel bad for falling in love with him. Love is not rational, it is often because of past-life ties, many people fall in love for the strangest "reasons" with the wrong person, because of these ties, or due to curses.

Detaching: https://www.satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Detaching.html

Emotions need to be felt, and sorted out, it is very unhealthy to block them out or deny them. Deal with them, and then you can be mentally/emotionally/psychologically and spiritually healthier. One thing that helps many people, is to write everything down for yourself, and get it all out on paper. If you want, you can feel anger and rage, direct it at the paper you just wrote on, and then burn it. This is a cathartic release that will help you. Just make sure you contain the burning paper safely, don't burn your house down.

Catharsis is very important and healthy. You know how some people will have a melt-down in public? This is from bottling up emotions. Take some time to yourself in private, and let it all out. Cry for as long as you can, let it all out, burn pictures of your ex, take scissors and cut up pictures of him, and then feel yourself free from the negative emotions and ready to heal.

(You wrote very well by the way :) )
 
Your routine is very messy and has stuff that definitely doesent work, you can’t do two sun squares at a time as the reps will add up and you will fail both squares. Let me explain: spiritual sun square has x reps to do everyday and material one has x reps to do in a day, if you do an incorrect number of repetitions in a day for a square you fail it, since you are doing two of the same squares you are basically mixing those rep and you will fail it.

Also, you are doing too many workings at once, that will deplete you of energy. You must choose your goals, and not overdo meditation(especially incorrectly done!! Lol)
I tend to do just working at a time so that my energy doesent deplete and workings get less effective.

I’ll give you a sample of meditation routine
Void meditation 5 minutes (this is the most important meditation you do, without confentration there will be no power in your meditation sessions, this meditation builds that concentration like a muscle.)
Cleaning the aura and chakras
Empowering the chakras
Working(money, munka, whatever you want)
End
This is straight to the point. If you have other questions just ask.
 
SerLorars13 said:
It's not the first time when I do a high amount of RTR's a day, tho last time I did 8 RTRs and I only could do them just for a few days and after that I didn't had the motivation to do them anymore. Now if I look at what I do now, if I look at those high amounts of reps it's clearly why I feel less motivation, or this is what I just think, it takes too much energy. But at the same time In my head I think I have sufficient energy. My schedule is this and it escalated quickly cause 3 weeks ago was very small compared to this:
- Aura cleaning before and after the schedule
-Munka working (9x each main chakra and 9x affirmation and I intend to do it until 14 nov [90 days])
- Obliterate Saturn (Sol 111x and 9x affirmation and I intend to do it until 14 nov [90 days])
- SURYAYE for AoP (216x and 9x affirmation and I intend to do it until 2 nov [90 days])
- 2 RTRs
- Sun Spiritual Square ( I end it on 30th)
- 2 RTRs
- Sun Material Square ( I ent it on 30th)
- 2 RTRs
- Mars Material Square ( I end it on the 30th)
- 2 RTRs
- Jupiter Material Square ( I end it on the 30th)
- 2 RTRs
- Jupiter Spiritual Square ( I end it on the 30)
- Removing Curses Part II

I think I am doing many mistakes here and I'm pushing myself too much. I think it is best to end those squares and after that I will just start the 6 month training program which I tried to do, but I never really made it far more than the 2nd month.
In my head if I'm doing so many workings I should be able to have enough energy to do the RTR's too. I am overwhelmed after I do just one working that's why I do right after 2 RTR's to drain the energy that's too much to bear. I'm starting to think that's not ok. Should I keep the RTR's like this until I end the Squares or should I stop doing the squares and make no more than 4 RTR's a day? (I also try to do 10 RTR's a day because of the times we are in right now [That holiday that jews have, ah yes, AV if I recall it corectly])

I will do Wunjo with 36 reps, but I'm not sure what affirmation to create, to use. And if it's not overwhelming when I do the work I will try to stay focused on my goal. It's hard to stay focused when I do a work with high reps or many in a row.
Thank you for your advice! <3
Routines are individual, but I do think what you are doing here isn't very healthy or effective. How come all those Squares end conveniently on the 30th? Or do you mean you plan on cancelling them then?

Overall I think you should stick to doing maybe one or two planetary squares at a time, especially when you're still new. Slyscorpion theorized that it would be possible to do both the material and spiritual square of a planet simultaneously, but this has not been officially approved of yet. I would strongly recommend to only do one of each planetary square at a time. You can do one Sun square and one Mars square at the same time, but not one material Sun square and one spiritual Sun square, for example. The same goes for doing two material Sun squares or two spiritual Sun squares, of course.

If you plan on cancelling them anyways, I would recommend to just stop them immediately. If after doing this you feel that you have a lot of unused energies, just do the RTR until the energies calm down. If they still persist even after this, ask Satan or your GD to take your energies and use them for whatever purpose they see fit.

Also, you said you were doing the RTRs immediately after the squares. This is very bad.
Let me introduce you to something called "resting times". After you do a working, there is a certain amount of time needed for the energies to "settle" and fully go where they are supposed to go. This is usually around 45 minutes. During this time, if you do another working, it will disturb the energies and either weaken both workings, or make them fail entirely depending on how little time you waited inbetween them.
Try to get something else done after you finished doing a working for the day. I like to do a stretching routine afterwards. Maybe some yoga or a workout. You could also play some games or eat something. Either way, leave at least 45 minutes inbetween your workings if at all possible.
If you are in a hurry and have limited time, you can cut this down all the way to 30 or even 15 minutes, but bear in mind there will be a degree of weakening due to this. Once you advance, you will eventually be able to make these energies settle faster and you wont have to wait 45 minutes every time, but for the forseeable future you should stick to this whenever you can.

Next, let me address the 216x Suryae. Like I said in my previous reply, you should focus mainly on making your vibrations thoroughly lengthy, and powerful. This matters 1000x more than the "amount" you do them for. With those 216x Suryae, I strongly assume that you are rushing through the vibrations for the most part. If you were to do these thoroughly in a drawn-out manner, it would take you approximately 1 full hour to finish the vibrations. Of course, if you are actually doing it like this then that's great. I would even say that this would be quite impressive. But seeing how you're still rather new I'm assuming you are not doing these vibrations properly in the drawn-out manner for a full hour straight.
I would recommend since you are already doing it for a while now, to continue it until November and finish it with 90 days. But after this, you would get much better results just doing a lower amount of vibrations that are more thoroughly and strongly vibrated, instead.

Also, the number 9 for your affirmations is only recommended for workings that have to do with endings. As such, it is indeed viable for your Munka working and your Obliterating Saturn working. For the AoP however, 18 would be a much more fitting number.

As for the Wunjo affirmation, just think of what goal you wish to achieve with it. You can use this template if you want: "In a positive way for me, [goal you want to achieve], now, continously, and forever."
In this case you could use "In a positive way for me, I am always safely and healthily expressing my emotions, now, continously, and forever."

Prioritize focus and thorough vibrations above all else. It doesnt matter if you need to stick to low vibrations in the beginning. What matters is that you practice to consistently keep laser-focus on your goal from start to finish, every time you do the working. This is what truly gives them power :)
 
SerLorars13 said:
Thank you Aquarius and Shael, I really didn't knew I was doing everything wrong, well almost.
I didn't knew you need to let energies "settle" about 45 minutes or more. I will stop those squares imediately.
From now I keep just:
- Obliterate Saturn
- Munka
- AoP SURYAE
-2 RTRs
- on 30th I will add Wunjo working too

These are just workings, and that's it, no more workings untill i don't finish them.

And Aquarius I'm gonna use that sample of routine as a base if it's ok. And maybe add some yoga, but sometime later.
I will keep it simple.

I don't know what it made me ask for guidance, but I'm glad I asked. Thank you :)
If possible, add on the Returning Curses I and II atleast once a day. It's an important part in keeping yourself clean and protected. Just make sure the moon isn't void when you do it for the first time.

Also I recommend adding on Yoga as soon as it is convenient for you. Both Kundalini Yoga and Hatha Yoga are very important for increasing your energy and flexibility and have lots of benefits. Perhaps after you finish your 90-day workings you can reshape your schedule to include those two types of Yoga, too.

Here the official link (from Satan's Library) to the routines in case you need them. :)
https://www.dropbox.com/s/dl/w2yd6kb6zwf0qe5/KUNDALINI%20%26%20HATHA%20YOGA%20ROUTINE.zip
 
SerLorars13 said:
Thank you Aquarius and Shael, I really didn't knew I was doing everything wrong, well almost.
I didn't knew you need to let energies "settle" about 45 minutes or more. I will stop those squares imediately.
From now I keep just:
- Obliterate Saturn
- Munka
- AoP SURYAE
-2 RTRs
- on 30th I will add Wunjo working too

These are just workings, and that's it, no more workings untill i don't finish them.

And Aquarius I'm gonna use that sample of routine as a base if it's ok. And maybe add some yoga, but sometime later.
I will keep it simple.

I don't know what it made me ask for guidance, but I'm glad I asked. Thank you :)
If possible, add on the Returning Curses I and II atleast once a day. It's an important part in keeping yourself clean and protected. Just make sure the moon isn't void when you do it for the first time.

Also I recommend adding on Yoga as soon as it is convenient for you. Both Kundalini Yoga and Hatha Yoga are very important for increasing your energy and flexibility and have lots of benefits. Perhaps after you finish your 90-day workings you can reshape your schedule to include those two types of Yoga, too.

Here the official link (from Satan's Library) to the routines in case you need them. :)
https://www.dropbox.com/s/dl/w2yd6kb6zwf0qe5/KUNDALINI%20%26%20HATHA%20YOGA%20ROUTINE.zip
 
Since your supposed to clean a minimum of twice a day. At the very least consider Returning Curses pt.1 the prayer to summon the entity that helps with cleaning. That way you clean better.

Note I said RC 1 not RC 2 for 216. Not to overload you with two 216(432) blasts. Just focus on the basic visual cleaning and let the demon friend help cleanse you.

That way you are at least doing two deeper cleanings. Sure another 216 would clean great but for your sanity keep it reasonable.

Also BTW when cleaning your chakras with visual only try and consider the sermon by Maxine on pushing an energy through the chakra 5-25 times. So visualize a white or white-gold light around the chakra and on top of that the energy to clean the chakra that way you kinda combine basic Aura cleaning with this small cleanse booster.

https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=13390
 
SerLorars13 said:
Now I do 216x SURYAE in the drawn-out manner and it's taking me approximately 1 hour. And now it's even more powerful, I can feel it. I was rushing the vibrations in every working, but now I take it more slowly. This is amazing!

I take the time to rest for 45 min or more between each woking, I'm not so overwhelmed anymore, but the energies are still powerful enough and sometimes i can't concentrate i even daydream lol. This only means that I must do void meditation multiple times a day not just twice plus something to increase my capacity for handling energy, if I'm right.

Thank you again! :)
I'm glad it's working well for you. The reason I recommend to do the vibrations like this is because for easily the first 2 years into being an SS I always rushed every vibration, and didn't focus properly. I only got lackluster results because of this and it improved drastically once I switched to this drawn-out method with full focus instead.

Always make sure you don't "overload" yourself as the energies can get very intense especially if you do something like 216x Suryae in the proper way. For me an overload feels like a tingly sensation in my hands, but unlike the normal sensation of energy this is a cold tingling. This can be a sign of overloading. If you experience this it might be a sign to stick to lower amounts of vibrations for now.
You didn't seem to have this happening to you, so probably you are fine. I just wanted to add this as a little security-reminder.

Check this sermon from HP. Hoodedcobra666 on overloading, too. I think it's very insightful. :)
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=20246&p=86514
 
Shael said:
SerLorars13 said:
...

Check this sermon from HP. Hoodedcobra666 on overloading, too. I think it's very insightful. :)
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=20246&p=86514
I actually linked the wrong sermon by accident. Whoops. This is the one I actually meant:
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=18815&p=74925
 
There's no rule that tell you how much you should wait between workings and meditations in order to avoid weakening the energies. One thing is waiting in order to avoid overloading yourself, another is waiting in order to avoid spreading the energies too thin and weakening the working.

Overloading aside, one may need 5, 15, 30 or even a couple of hours to avoid weakening/diluting the energies. There's no one size fits all with this things. It's entirely individual and you will understand your individual circumstances with time. No one beside your GD and yourself can tell you about individual circumstances like this.

So don't take anyone's word for granted because that will only create unsupported expectations in your mind that will against your advancement and your other goals the moment you don't live up to those ridiculous expectations.
 
Indeed Munka brings all the shit from the soul on the surface and is pushing you to deal with it until you solve it. Here not the emotions are the problem, but the source of those emotions. Is just you being so emotional or you feel them due to a trauma (like that breakup)? Definitely there should be a reason behind them. Tell us more if you want and maybe we can help more. If not, try to discover what is the reason/source of these extreme feelings and start a work with an appropiate rune to bring you what you need to detach from them or planetary square to empower the relevant chakra and planet.

Apparently seems to be Venus and throat chakra since it governs the emotions. But you need to have a careful look at your natal chart and see if you were liable from birth to strong emotions. My advice still is to figure out what causes you those emotions and do a work to eliminate it. Like do a work to get a new boyfriend if that breakup had a so strong emotional impact on you.
 
SerLorars13 said:
I want to make my ex suffer, suffer as I suffer. But I don't know if that's ok.

So this is how I feel now, what can I do to solve these problems?
Well you can curse him is you have a good reason for it.

And as I said, get a new boyfriend if this will make you happy. Programme your aura to attract someone to fit you.
 
SerLorars13 said:
I don't know if being lied and played is a good reason to curse. But those ties must be cut off anyway.

Thanks, I will try to get a new boyfriend, and try not to get obsessed about him (Mars and Pluto are in my 5th house so I think I can get obsessed).
Hail Satan!
Everything done willingly against you is enough for you to take revenge on him. The problem here is that it takes a lot of time and energy for it.
 
SerLorars13 said:
I don't know if being lied and played is a good reason to curse. But those ties must be cut off anyway.
I think if someone intentionally hurts you and causes you grief, you have every right to curse them in return. Perhaps a deathspell would be going a bit overboard, but you could maybe use the Tyr rune to bring about justice and fair punishment. It's number 17 in the runic kabalah.

SerLorars13 said:
Thanks, I will try to get a new boyfriend, and try not to get obsessed about him (Mars and Pluto are in my 5th house so I think I can get obsessed).
Hail Satan!
If you are unsure about your own planetary aspects and natal chart in general, I'd recommend you to order a reading from one of our astrologers. It's very inexpesively priced considering how valuable the knowledge is that you gain through it. HP Hoodedcobra666 is currently still busy completing previous orders from what I know, so I'd recommend checking out Lydia's services over at http://lydiasastrology.com/.:)
 
Like others said, don't keep inside these emotions.

I used to do so for many years and when I first dedicated everything came out and It was ten times worse.

Hope you will get better soon, I wish you all the best :)
 
Quite often, when doing freeing the soul workings, the problem appears to get worse. This is because the problem is rising to the surface to be removed, stick with it and it will be completely removed. I've done more freeing soul workings than I can remember over the years, and they often feel worse for a few weeks and then they get better :)
 
SerLorars13 said:
Lydia said:
Quite often, when doing freeing the soul workings, the problem appears to get worse. This is because the problem is rising to the surface to be removed, stick with it and it will be completely removed. I've done more freeing soul workings than I can remember over the years, and they often feel worse for a few weeks and then they get better :)

Almost every problem got worse.
Freeing the chakras from Negative Karma using Munka really made me vulnerable. I even got scared just by looking at some random photo with a woman smiling lol.

I've done a research concerning my natal chart and I've found some general problems, I'm not an adept tho, it took me alot even just to find simple things. But many problems seem to match what I've found in my natal chart.

I do Obliterate Saturn to get rid of my anxiety, some emotional traumas and my problems regarding speaking and general comunication and flow of energy I think.

I have some kind of friend (not SS) that she says she can feel energy (she might me capable, but I'm not sure about it) and she said that my energy is repressed. Well I'm not surprised, even my blood flow doesn't seem good (most of the time my feet and arms are cold), and I never tested my lungs to check if they have a problem. But I feel pain daily regarding my heart, and I think It's tied somehow with Anxiety.

The problems seem to get worse, but I'm happy, this means my working... works :))))

I stick with it as best as I can, thank you for advice! :)
Please don't listen to non-ss, they are severely deluded regarding energy and most times speak about stuff that they don't even understand, most times they are just people who want to show off talking about energy ecc
 
Are you also doing yoga? Yoga alone will raise you to a higher level and overcome a lot, so combining it with freeing soul workings will be more powerful, and safer, as yoga regulates energy flow, helps to open chakras, and many more benefits.
 
SerLorars13 said:
I start to feel a desire to punch, squeeze, beat something until I get tired or bored. I wonder why.
And yesterday after I started doing hatha yoga my sexual energies got stronger and after I finished the yoga session I masturbated and I directed the energy to my (potential) GD.
It felt so good, better than other days. I'm masturbating frequently, but yesterday I felt much more pleasure and the sexual energy was a lot more stronger and intense.
Not to mention that my hatred for jews and christards got stronger too along with anger.
I just wanted to say this.

Hail Satan!
Glad to hear some that your repressed emotions are starting to come out. Keep it up :)
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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