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A Decade

HPS Lydia

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The Beginning

This Halloween marks my 10 year anniversary as a dedicated Satanist. One random day about a week before Halloween 10 years ago, someone I knew bought a copy of Anton LaVey’s Satanic Bible as a laugh, and then gave it to me for no apparent reason (I realized afterwards that it was Satan bringing me to Him). I read it, and thought it was much more logical and appealing than any crap I had previously read from other religions.

And then that Halloween, I knew I would have the house to myself all evening/night. I had been invited out to a Halloween party but declined and pretended to be sick, which made some people mad at me but whatever. I had planned to dedicate my soul to Satan, as my life sucked and I had a weird feeling that maybe dedicating would help in some way.

I then searched online for additional methods to dedicate, other than what was in the Satanic Bible. I have always enjoyed looking for additional methods to anything, for inspiration to create my own way of doing something. I googled “dedicate to Satan”, saw some awful images in the search results (typical of the enemy trying to scare people away from Satan), then saw a link from a website called joyofsatan.org. I thought the “joy” part was nice, and the (dot)org appealed to me as it made it seem official.

I read the method to dedicate, then decided to check out the rest of the website. I was blown away. While reading, I would have a thought having to do with what I just read, and then as if by magick, I would be lead to another page that answered my question. This continued for about 5 straight hours.

I then noticed the time, and realized the person I lived with was going to be home from a Halloween party soon. It was around 2am, I scrambled to get the tools needed for dedication. I happened to have 3 red candles, so I lit those and did the dedication. As soon as the paper with my signature in blood lit on fire to burn, I felt an immense weight off my shoulders. Like I had been carrying a solid ton of negativity or something, and it was all lifted. Intense peace and calmness, and a feeling of belonging.

Over the next bunch of months, I spent hours every day reading the website. I didn’t bother to look into the yahoo groups until I was around 4-6 months in. I just wanted to learn everything on the website. I also created an astral temple, a really awesome looking one. If I could, I would draw it for you all to see. I still occasionally pop in and am reminded of the time I took to make it. The day I created it, when I finished, I saw Satan in there. I could only see his head and face and only for a moment, but it was a beautiful moment and made me feel like I actually mattered to him in some way.


Finding My Guardian

I had read a method of finding one’s guardian, to simply relax and ask yourself who it might be, and then be lead to him/her.

I was visiting an elderly and sick relative, who had to go lie down for a short while during our visit, the usual routine we had. I sat on the couch by myself, went into a light trance, and asked myself who it could be. I then saw in my mind, a planet, Saturn. I walked to my astral temple, outside of it, where I had flowers along the nice pathway. I suddenly smelled flowers. I asked myself what flower it was, and the word “hyacinth” popped into my head. I had no idea what those flowers smelled like or even looked like, never even saw them in real life before.

So when I went home, I looked through the lists of Demons who matched both Saturn as their planet, and hyacinth as their plant. Lord Set was the only one. His color is red, which was my favorite as a child. I of course had doubts that he really was my guardian, as he is one of Satan’s sons and therefore high ranking and I was just a nobody. But then his name kept “coincidentally” coming up, both in my head and also in real life. I watched a TV show with a friend later that day (or maybe the next day, but no later than that), and there was a Demon named Set in that episode. It was probably in a blasphemous manner, but all the same, it was his name.

There were a few other signs, they were each once per day, but I forget the other signs (I’ll edit this if I remember). As well, Set’s name kept ringing in my head for weeks. I finally gave up doubting, and accepted that he was my Guardian.

Lord Set was my Guardian for the first 6 years of my dedication, and we had known each other in at least one of my past lives as well. On that anniversary, he told me I was going to have a new guardian, as he was going to be too busy for the next while. I also got the impression that I didn’t need one as much as I did back then. So even though he is no longer my Guardian, I have endless love, respect, and appreciation for him, always.


My First Group Ritual

Back in those days, RTR’s were not out yet. We did monthly rituals timed with the phase and sign of the Moon: a destruction ritual to destroy the enemy programs, and an awakening ritual to bring people to Satan.

After my months of reading the JoS, I finally decided to have a peek at the yahoo groups (this was before the forum existed). I noticed that there was only just over 3,000 members in the main group. There was a group ritual posted, by a HPS Zildar. It was for that day, or perhaps the next day, I can’t remember exactly. But I eagerly prepared for it, and did the ritual to the best of my ability. It was just a prayer, and vibrating a few runes 8 times each. She also included a way to clean the aura and chakras, the “table-top method”, of scanning light down the body and pushing out any negative energy, so I did that right after finishing the ritual.

The very exact moment I finished, my phone rang. It was the local pizza company, offering me a discount on my next order. I thanked them, hung up, and then realized this must have been some sort of gift from Satan, showing me that I was on the right path in participating in the group rituals. The timing was way too coincidental, them calling the exact moment I finished. Not during the ritual, or an hour later, but exactly when I finished.


Over The Years

A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating. I have meditated in public bathrooms, park benches, on a bus… whatever it takes. I have also never lost faith in Satan. I have definitely doubted myself and if I was important or insignificant to him or anything, but I never gave up believing in Him and trying to advance myself under His guidance and will. That’s actually an affirmation I used to use daily, something about continuously advancing under Satan’s guidance and will, I can’t remember it fully now though.

I would also like to take the time to publicly thank a few other Gods and Goddesses who have helped me over the years. Osiris, for encouragement with yoga, leading me to new resources and encouraging me to challenge myself to learn more advanced asanas, and to re-learn some basics but at a deeper level. Erishkegal, for helping me with a Neptune transit. I never summoned them, they each came to me on their own accord. Erishkegal came to me when I was doing laundry one day, her energy feels so grounded and solid but also a bit fiery, perfect for dealing with Neptune. Maat, Furcas, Bifrons, Barbatos, Valefor, and a few others have also been of great help, in overall advancement but also in showing me how wonderful Satanism is, and how much better things can get. Opportunities that only dedicated Satanists are privileged to. Amon Ra for fixing something in my soul, also never summoned him, he came while I was just looking at his sigil one day. Inanna, Lilith. And others.

I have seen SS here who refuse to get in touch with the Demons, wanting to do things themselves. With all due respect, this is like the typical 2 year old who wants to be independent and do things, but they either make a mess, or break something. Satan and his Demons know us better than we know ourselves: they know our past, our fate, our karma, and our future. They want to help us, they want us to advance, evolve, overcome obstacles and issues, and perfect ourselves. Don’t ignore them. With some of the things I have been helped with, I had no idea there even was a problem. Like Amon Ra who randomly came to me and attuned something in my soul. I have always remained open to guidance from Satan and his Demons.

If you feel the need for guidance, but are unsure of what exactly, or maybe you just want to feel closer to Satan and the Demons, one idea is to have a look at our SS Calendar and see whose week it is. Meditate on their sigil, read their description on the JoS. One visualization exercise I do is seeing their sigil in my mind but in their candle color, and with their plants or anything next to it, and even incorporate their element if possible. Sort of like a fancy 3D portrait, the better your visualization and imagination, the better the portrait. And do this every 5 or so days for each one, through the year. At least 10 Demons have come to me from me just doing this exercise, or they at least quickly sent me a small piece of advice.


Wondering what to do for Halloween? You can read, or re-read, the JoS. I will also go looking for a pumpkin to carve, and then hold a thanksgiving ritual. Plus do the F-RTR, obviously. What are your plans? :)

Happy Halloween!
-Lydia
 
Very nice testimony, enjoyed it. :)


Mine 10 year anniversary was in January this year. I kinda know how you feel, and how it is like to reminisce.



Let’s hope the next ten years are even more amazing, sister. :)


Hail Satan! Forever!
 
Niece to read. Congrats!!! Cannot wait to advance further and to become a stronger magician and a proficient tarot card reader.
I made my commitment in August 19. The very same moment the paper of my prayer was completly burnt I felt a bliss and I myself began to burn. My lower chakras were smoldering, mainly the root chakra and the solar plexus. After four months of persistance, dedication and systematic working on meditation, yoga and hard studying, things began to change for the better. I started to perceive life differently and what surrounds me too.
Whenever you begin to think you are going to fail, or what you are doing doesn't worth the effort, when the enemy seems to be invincible, when you get scared, when you see how dreadful, spiteful, ignorant and stupid humankind has become and seems to worsen, or when you run out of strength to fight, just thinking on His name SATAN or pronouncing it whether out loud or in your head deffinitely help you to sort shit out.

Once you commit to Him and bust your arse off training, doing yoga, meditating, attacking, smiting, cursing with all the wrath and hatred the enemy, practicing black magick and learning, learning, learning, learning and learning nothing appears to be able to deter you from your goal. Once the prayer with your blood is burnt the wicked ones can no longer touch you or harm you. You are protected by his guidance, power and love.
It is true many get cold feet to give the first step i.e. to commit themselves, to attest Him as their ONLY and TRUE Creator Father, this is due to the fucking christian programming since millennia and also due to the psychic attacks the greys and the ilk throw at you to make you change your mind and to make you remain ignorant and oblivious under jewsus "protection".

I remember as a child having troubles, problems or stuff to deal with and I didn't know how to tackle them so I looked for the aid of jewsus and he never replied. Nothing. Not a single fucking clue, not a gentle touch, not a hot presence of him, not voice in my head to appease my nerves or to release me from my fears. Now I know why for he is a jewish supremacist gentile hating fictitious entity. So much praying in vain just to empower our enslavers and feed the jews with my magnificent energy.
After you get in touch with such a powerful being as Satan is nothing can make you believe he is fictitious or that he doesn't love you.

HAIL SATAN!!!!
 
This is a very lovely story. Thank you for this. We always read of the problems of a lot of SS novice who struggle to communicate with the God's (rightfully asking for advice) so it's nice to hear these type of stories :)
 
Lydia said:
My First Group Ritual

Back in those days, RTR’s were not out yet. We did monthly rituals timed with the phase and sign of the Moon: a destruction ritual to destroy the enemy programs, and an awakening ritual to bring people to Satan.

After my months of reading the JoS, I finally decided to have a peek at the yahoo groups (this was before the forum existed). I noticed that there was only just over 3,000 members in the main group. There was a group ritual posted, by a HPS Zildar. It was for that day, or perhaps the next day, I can’t remember exactly. But I eagerly prepared for it, and did the ritual to the best of my ability. It was just a prayer, and vibrating a few runes 8 times each. She also included a way to clean the aura and chakras, the “table-top method”, of scanning light down the body and pushing out any negative energy, so I did that right after finishing the ritual.

The very exact moment I finished, my phone rang. It was the local pizza company, offering me a discount on my next order. I thanked them, hung up, and then realized this must have been some sort of gift from Satan, showing me that I was on the right path in participating in the group rituals. The timing was way too coincidental, them calling the exact moment I finished. Not during the ritual, or an hour later, but exactly when I finished.

Although I'm aware of the destruction runic rituals. For example back around 2005 or so some anti-Grey alien rituals were posted two or three times during that year. I also recall the anti-vatican ritual sometime in 2003 which lead to the issues in 2004 after decades of supposed silence. I also recall a blood staining ritual marking a large runic yantra as a force multiplier to attack.

But what about this awakening ritual? I know this is pre-2013 when the first W88/B99 race rituals popped up. I'd be interested in the history of your aforementioned awakening ritual.

Although I should point something out despite the fact that by 2008 some 20,000 members were in JoS, which funny enough surprised Satan despite not believing the JoS would be successful on top of that Maxine mentioned Satan stated we were two years ahead of schedule.

HP.Cobra replied to me one time mentioning only between 1-3 thousand people ever fully committed to doing monthly or bi-monthly rituals. This was well before the RTRs and well before race awakening rituals.

But like I mentioned I never knew the JoS had propaganda rituals for inciting people to join.

It's funny only 1-3 thousand people can affect the landscape.
 
Lydia said:
I have seen SS here who refuse to get in touch with the Demons, wanting to do things themselves.
In someway, that is me, after I was new and getting out of a period of delusions I never really opened myself up to the Gods, mainly due to thinking I should be more mature to approach them, recently(about 1 year from now) I have opened myself up a lot with Father Satan, on the 1st of January, at midnight I did a thanksgiving ritual and I have told him my new year resolutions and asked him to guide me toward reaching them, needless to say that this has been one of the best years of my life, one in which I actually feel like I advanced, it's a year in which on the next 31st of December I will be able to look at with satisfaction. Thank you Father Satan.

Thank you for reminding me to connect with our Gods, I have been postponing this for too long.

Lydia said:
Wondering what to do for Halloween? You can read, or re-read, the JoS. I will also go looking for a pumpkin to carve, and then hold a thanksgiving ritual. Plus do the F-RTR, obviously. What are your plans?
I hope to do a nice campfire and carve a pumpkin, and a ritual to Satan too!:)
 
Congrats on your anniversary, Lydia! It’s always nice hearing from you, whether it’s a story for the holidays, a past experience of yours, or advice for any of us. I get a warm tingly feeling :D

As far as my own plans for Halloween, who knows. I might have a friend who wants to carve pumpkins with me.
 
Happy ten years Lydia! I remember 10 years ago, I would have just turned 15. We talked a bit on the old forums and helped each other out. Back when jewbook was fairly new we talked on there too and the conversations were always positive and productive, and you were never out of line or weird. This post has me reflecting on my own journey as well. Thank you for always being such a phenomenal example.

The Gods are incredible. They do come on their own accord and I’m glad you stated some of what you did there. Another amazing example is that the other day, before my dog was showing any major signs or symptoms of having been bitten by a spider (he threw up the day prior but I thought it was because he ate a band-aid) I was laying down and I suddenly felt and saw an energy incredibly bright like the sun and a very large blonde man. The energy was charming and I instantly received two calls from important people who are friends and have bigger work connections that I hadn’t heard from in a while. That was more of an identifier. I realized it was him pretty quickly but I hadn’t met him previously. Satan also came to me that day before anything happened with my dog and with both of them I was wondering why they were there and so present. They helped with some other issues and in the back of my mind I just kept feeling and hearing concern for my dog. He suddenly took a turn and then I knew something was very wrong. I still had some doubts but I couldn’t help but think that if this was just a minor issue that would pass, why would Satan himself say something about my dog? Anything Satan says is always of extreme importance. I was told it was an allergy and to take him home by another vet, but he was beginning to struggle to breathe and I almost decided to wait it out. I also didn’t have the money for an emergency room visit. I was told not to worry about the money and to GO. After the second vet visit, they said there is still a possibility he wouldn’t pull through after treatment. He was in an immense amount of pain and he was crying. I brought him home and Anubis was with me. I didn’t think I was capable of animal reiki but I knew this was why he was there. Through his guidance and energy, he charged me up and I allowed him to fully come through and give me psychic guidance. I listened to him psychically ahead of time in regards to meditation too and I just didn’t know why he was there doing all of that with me, 10 ish hours ahead of time, but it was to clear my mind and prep me for how quickly this was needed. The energy was very powerful but very easy and kind on my dog. His energy works very well with dogs. Together, within just 10 minutes, he stopped crying, got up, and drank water and wanted to eat. The swelling went down almost instantly and the heat from his leg was gone. The effects were instant and life saving. I don’t think they otherwise would’ve been so present. Satan also helped send energy while he was at the vet and while I was waiting. I had actually heard a few days earlier something about my dog as well, but I thought this was my own mind and I thought I was just being a worry wart. Since then he has also been very present in helping with protection from psychic attacks, the heart chakra, and has given aid in facilitating a work change.
 
A very nice post. I am way behind you but your method of finding your GD was very similar to mine and I also felt that ton of negativity shift off my being. Since starting RTRs I have not failed a single day but you give me inspiration to hit the 10 year mark someday.

As a Celtic holiday Halloween/Samhain has immense significance. So I will celebrate Halloween/Samhain as best I can with all the regulations...
 
Lydia said:
The Beginning
A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating.
-Lydia
Do you qualify for hps lol? This was very interesting to read and very weird to think that 10 years ago you were all doing this important stuff and i remember exactly what i was doing 10 years ago: playing castle miner z on the xbox360 as a little young munchkin. I never really wanted to contact any of the gods for multiple reason (my people skills being one of them), but its so funny how they just show up to help without any warning; That scares me. I feel like one day years from now that will happen and i wont have a shirt on, or socks, or something.
 
Thank you for the story Lydia. Very motivating. Very nice read.

I won't be doing much on Halloween, besides the Final RTR and enjoying myself.

Good luck with the pumpkin carve!
 
Lydia said:
The Beginning

This Halloween marks my 10 year anniversary as a dedicated Satanist. One random day about a week before Halloween 10 years ago, someone I knew bought a copy of Anton LaVey’s Satanic Bible as a laugh, and then gave it to me for no apparent reason (I realized afterwards that it was Satan bringing me to Him). I read it, and thought it was much more logical and appealing than any crap I had previously read from other religions.

And then that Halloween, I knew I would have the house to myself all evening/night. I had been invited out to a Halloween party but declined and pretended to be sick, which made some people mad at me but whatever. I had planned to dedicate my soul to Satan, as my life sucked and I had a weird feeling that maybe dedicating would help in some way.

I then searched online for additional methods to dedicate, other than what was in the Satanic Bible. I have always enjoyed looking for additional methods to anything, for inspiration to create my own way of doing something. I googled “dedicate to Satan”, saw some awful images in the search results (typical of the enemy trying to scare people away from Satan), then saw a link from a website called joyofsatan.org. I thought the “joy” part was nice, and the (dot)org appealed to me as it made it seem official.

I read the method to dedicate, then decided to check out the rest of the website. I was blown away. While reading, I would have a thought having to do with what I just read, and then as if by magick, I would be lead to another page that answered my question. This continued for about 5 straight hours.

I then noticed the time, and realized the person I lived with was going to be home from a Halloween party soon. It was around 2am, I scrambled to get the tools needed for dedication. I happened to have 3 red candles, so I lit those and did the dedication. As soon as the paper with my signature in blood lit on fire to burn, I felt an immense weight off my shoulders. Like I had been carrying a solid ton of negativity or something, and it was all lifted. Intense peace and calmness, and a feeling of belonging.

Over the next bunch of months, I spent hours every day reading the website. I didn’t bother to look into the yahoo groups until I was around 4-6 months in. I just wanted to learn everything on the website. I also created an astral temple, a really awesome looking one. If I could, I would draw it for you all to see. I still occasionally pop in and am reminded of the time I took to make it. The day I created it, when I finished, I saw Satan in there. I could only see his head and face and only for a moment, but it was a beautiful moment and made me feel like I actually mattered to him in some way.


Finding My Guardian

I had read a method of finding one’s guardian, to simply relax and ask yourself who it might be, and then be lead to him/her.

I was visiting an elderly and sick relative, who had to go lie down for a short while during our visit, the usual routine we had. I sat on the couch by myself, went into a light trance, and asked myself who it could be. I then saw in my mind, a planet, Saturn. I walked to my astral temple, outside of it, where I had flowers along the nice pathway. I suddenly smelled flowers. I asked myself what flower it was, and the word “hyacinth” popped into my head. I had no idea what those flowers smelled like or even looked like, never even saw them in real life before.

So when I went home, I looked through the lists of Demons who matched both Saturn as their planet, and hyacinth as their plant. Lord Set was the only one. His color is red, which was my favorite as a child. I of course had doubts that he really was my guardian, as he is one of Satan’s sons and therefore high ranking and I was just a nobody. But then his name kept “coincidentally” coming up, both in my head and also in real life. I watched a TV show with a friend later that day (or maybe the next day, but no later than that), and there was a Demon named Set in that episode. It was probably in a blasphemous manner, but all the same, it was his name.

There were a few other signs, they were each once per day, but I forget the other signs (I’ll edit this if I remember). As well, Set’s name kept ringing in my head for weeks. I finally gave up doubting, and accepted that he was my Guardian.

Lord Set was my Guardian for the first 6 years of my dedication, and we had known each other in at least one of my past lives as well. On that anniversary, he told me I was going to have a new guardian, as he was going to be too busy for the next while. I also got the impression that I didn’t need one as much as I did back then. So even though he is no longer my Guardian, I have endless love, respect, and appreciation for him, always.


My First Group Ritual

Back in those days, RTR’s were not out yet. We did monthly rituals timed with the phase and sign of the Moon: a destruction ritual to destroy the enemy programs, and an awakening ritual to bring people to Satan.

After my months of reading the JoS, I finally decided to have a peek at the yahoo groups (this was before the forum existed). I noticed that there was only just over 3,000 members in the main group. There was a group ritual posted, by a HPS Zildar. It was for that day, or perhaps the next day, I can’t remember exactly. But I eagerly prepared for it, and did the ritual to the best of my ability. It was just a prayer, and vibrating a few runes 8 times each. She also included a way to clean the aura and chakras, the “table-top method”, of scanning light down the body and pushing out any negative energy, so I did that right after finishing the ritual.

The very exact moment I finished, my phone rang. It was the local pizza company, offering me a discount on my next order. I thanked them, hung up, and then realized this must have been some sort of gift from Satan, showing me that I was on the right path in participating in the group rituals. The timing was way too coincidental, them calling the exact moment I finished. Not during the ritual, or an hour later, but exactly when I finished.


Over The Years

A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating. I have meditated in public bathrooms, park benches, on a bus… whatever it takes. I have also never lost faith in Satan. I have definitely doubted myself and if I was important or insignificant to him or anything, but I never gave up believing in Him and trying to advance myself under His guidance and will. That’s actually an affirmation I used to use daily, something about continuously advancing under Satan’s guidance and will, I can’t remember it fully now though.

I would also like to take the time to publicly thank a few other Gods and Goddesses who have helped me over the years. Osiris, for encouragement with yoga, leading me to new resources and encouraging me to challenge myself to learn more advanced asanas, and to re-learn some basics but at a deeper level. Erishkegal, for helping me with a Neptune transit. I never summoned them, they each came to me on their own accord. Erishkegal came to me when I was doing laundry one day, her energy feels so grounded and solid but also a bit fiery, perfect for dealing with Neptune. Maat, Furcas, Bifrons, Barbatos, Valefor, and a few others have also been of great help, in overall advancement but also in showing me how wonderful Satanism is, and how much better things can get. Opportunities that only dedicated Satanists are privileged to. Amon Ra for fixing something in my soul, also never summoned him, he came while I was just looking at his sigil one day. Inanna, Lilith. And others.

I have seen SS here who refuse to get in touch with the Demons, wanting to do things themselves. With all due respect, this is like the typical 2 year old who wants to be independent and do things, but they either make a mess, or break something. Satan and his Demons know us better than we know ourselves: they know our past, our fate, our karma, and our future. They want to help us, they want us to advance, evolve, overcome obstacles and issues, and perfect ourselves. Don’t ignore them. With some of the things I have been helped with, I had no idea there even was a problem. Like Amon Ra who randomly came to me and attuned something in my soul. I have always remained open to guidance from Satan and his Demons.

If you feel the need for guidance, but are unsure of what exactly, or maybe you just want to feel closer to Satan and the Demons, one idea is to have a look at our SS Calendar and see whose week it is. Meditate on their sigil, read their description on the JoS. One visualization exercise I do is seeing their sigil in my mind but in their candle color, and with their plants or anything next to it, and even incorporate their element if possible. Sort of like a fancy 3D portrait, the better your visualization and imagination, the better the portrait. And do this every 5 or so days for each one, through the year. At least 10 Demons have come to me from me just doing this exercise, or they at least quickly sent me a small piece of advice.


Wondering what to do for Halloween? You can read, or re-read, the JoS. I will also go looking for a pumpkin to carve, and then hold a thanksgiving ritual. Plus do the F-RTR, obviously. What are your plans? :)

Happy Halloween!
-Lydia

Awesome testimony Lydia :)

I have had several accounts of what you have described after even my first year so far. very interesting timings with things and even being timed with the perfect moon sign, like when i got my job for example when i came back home. I remember too right at the end of my returning curses ritual my phone rang immediately for my interview...the moon was in the very first few degrees of taurus too, perfect for money and material things and as permanent as it gets...explains why despite everything why i am still working here too. I really feel grateful and looked after.

Consecration is my plan for this year, and under the full moon too :D. on top of a huge thank you.
 
I'm happy to hear this! This marks a year since I have dedicated this year. I have gained so much this year but I also had to go through a lot of difficult challenges.I am very lucky to have an amazing guardian and incubus to help support me though this journey. I also have had the pleasure of meeting other gods and goddesses as well and I can't even tell you how amazing and great they are too.
 
This woke up a lot of memories, Lydia. Oh wow...

Happy decade anniversary! Your story, passion, comradeship, it truly woke up an inner spark I thought was gone. Reading this brought me in tears. I remember, when coming to JoS 9 years ago, and joining the Yahoo groups, you were one of the first people I noticed and conversed with. You focused on herbs at the time. This somehow, just, gave me back the same feeling I had the first years - Finding JoS, dedicating my soul, the journey of spirituality and so on.

I didn't realize how much I needed to just read this, this is wonderful. This really gave me back some memories, knowledge and spirit that I took way too granted...but no more!

Thank you so much for the reminder and your inspiration! And thank Satan and all of the Gods! And especial thanks, no, gratitude to my Guardian Buer!

I will celebrate Halloween by empowering my soul, giving energies to the Gods of Hell and ofc the F-RTR to screw the enemy loudly and proudly :cool:

Again, thank you Lydia! All the dark blessings to you my dear!
 
Big Dipper said:
Lydia said:
The Beginning
A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating.
-Lydia
Do you qualify for hps lol? This was very interesting to read and very weird to think that 10 years ago you were all doing this important stuff and i remember exactly what i was doing 10 years ago: playing castle miner z on the xbox360 as a little young munchkin. I never really wanted to contact any of the gods for multiple reason (my people skills being one of them), but its so funny how they just show up to help without any warning; That scares me. I feel like one day years from now that will happen and i wont have a shirt on, or socks, or something.

You don't need to have human communication skills to communicate with the Demons or Satan. Just open up in a honest manner, and stay level headed and open to receive answers. You need to give this a shot.
 
Congratulations Lydia. This would be my fourth year of being an SS. I love had many problems before and I pretty much go solutions. The Gods without a doubt are really helpful and are willing to step in if need be. Lord Cimeries would be one that has help me countless times.
 
Wish i would be as awesome someday as you Sister! I do a LOT of F-RTRs, about 10 a day. Have done 9140 rn, not that they have had that much power in them. Very VERY little actualy. Maybe like in 100 max in a "normal" Satanist. But still, i will never EVER give up on my loyalty to Father. Trust me on this, its FATAL. I actually had that moment, the most soul-hurting moment you would EVER have, when your mind is SOOO fucking weak and pathetic, that even after so much knowledge, it still just gives up on its own CREATOR for FUCKS SAKE! I never FUCKING EVER want to re-live that fucking ,moment EVER!!

When the time comes for the "physical phase" the "final phase", as in like the 3rd reich did. Not really like that but still like doing warfare things with other SS physically, like that theres like few dozen of us in the same building/area etc.
I PROMISE i will be the GREATEST and MOST WORK DOING SS THEN!! (As in that no matter HOW much i would do know, i would NEVER be able to be "the most helpful" relating to the war(not counting the Clergy who ARE in the "top 10" :D) , as i started about 5 years ago) Ive ALWAYS dreamed about it... When we would ACTUALLY PHYSICALLY organize and do things together side by side physically... AHH... IT JUST *HAS* TO HAPPEN ONE DAY RIGHT??? :roll: :p :p :p
 
Thank you, Lydia, for your SS story :)

I myself am planning to officially dedicate around Halloween. I've been a silent lurker around here and the JoS website for many weeks before making an account here.

So much to learn!

In my heart and soul, I believe deep down, I've always been on Satan's side, even before this lifetime, and he's been (or perhaps my own GD) with me, showing me signs all throughout my life, even ever since I was just a little girl.

I never stopped searching for truth. Never ever. Always searching tirelessly all throughout my life. I think for this reason, my GD or Satan has always been there, showing signs, helping me to delve more, to reveal more, etc.

One thing that I remember now as I'm typing is, this one particular dream I had when I was a preteen (I am now in my mid 30s). This dream, I still remember to this day. I dreamt of myself walking around an apartment complex, the me in my dream felt unhappy and lonely but also in search of something or someone. I went into a particular unit. In that unit stood a very tall and lean, blonde Caucasian looking man, a handsome man I had never seen before in real life, not even on TV or strangers in real life. His presence felt soothing and comfortable. Intuitively, I walked towards him, he welcomed me into his arms and hugged me with so much pure love. He never spoke literally but intuitively or telepathically, I naturally understood him telling me not to worry or be afraid, that he is always with me. And then the dream ended. And the feeling that was left was that of comfort, and it lasted all day. Whenever I think of this dream, I'm overcome by this feeling.

Another dream I had was of recent time. I had been wondering about demons in my mind, trying to know who my GD could possibly be. Then I had a dream, of me perusing around a dark cavern or cabin looking place. It definitely looked like it was underground. I opened a door and inside that dark chamber, there sat a dark figure. I was not afraid in my dream, I was rather curious yet was ready to fight if it was a dangerous person/creature. So I walked closer, his face becoming clearer. He was dressed all in black, black hood. I walked even closer and finally saw his face. Intimidating looking, red faced male. He looked at me and I got the sense he was no danger to me. I quickly felt safe and upon feeling that feeling of safety and security, the dream ended. And that face has stayed in my mind ever since. His eyes staring at me knowingly. Somehow, every time I remember this dream, I feel at ease automatically without thinking into it.

Maybe all of my life I was searching for them, Satan and the gods/goddesses on his side.

And I "know" for sure this lifetime is not my first lifetime, I've lived before. I feel comfortable with traditional stuff, traditional music, ancient wonders, classical music, my cultural heritage of old temples that used to be of vedic culture. I am drawn to all things of the past and the occult. I've had strange encounters with paranormal happenings. And my senses have always been keen and strong, this is also how I know I've lived before in the past, and also because I come from a line of sorcerers (in my country, it is not strange to seek the "witch doctor" or shaman or whatever you call it in English, it is also not strange to have a family member as one). This is how I just "know".

And here I am. Given this life, a chance to work on myself, my soul. All of my childhood miseries and of abuse in a domestic violent home was for a good reason, it lead me directly to SS, to Satan, to this forum and the websites. In this regard, I'm forever grateful to the gods. I'm grateful to the people here as well who work hard at maintaining the forum and the site.

And I hope to learn as much as possible as a student so that I may learn as much as possible so as to be able to help other new members as well. And most importantly, to advance.

In Satan I trust,
Thanks for having me here <3
 
Lydia said:
The Beginning

This Halloween marks my 10 year anniversary as a dedicated Satanist. One random day about a week before Halloween 10 years ago, someone I knew bought a copy of Anton LaVey’s Satanic Bible as a laugh, and then gave it to me for no apparent reason (I realized afterwards that it was Satan bringing me to Him). I read it, and thought it was much more logical and appealing than any crap I had previously read from other religions.

And then that Halloween, I knew I would have the house to myself all evening/night. I had been invited out to a Halloween party but declined and pretended to be sick, which made some people mad at me but whatever. I had planned to dedicate my soul to Satan, as my life sucked and I had a weird feeling that maybe dedicating would help in some way.

I then searched online for additional methods to dedicate, other than what was in the Satanic Bible. I have always enjoyed looking for additional methods to anything, for inspiration to create my own way of doing something. I googled “dedicate to Satan”, saw some awful images in the search results (typical of the enemy trying to scare people away from Satan), then saw a link from a website called joyofsatan.org. I thought the “joy” part was nice, and the (dot)org appealed to me as it made it seem official.

I read the method to dedicate, then decided to check out the rest of the website. I was blown away. While reading, I would have a thought having to do with what I just read, and then as if by magick, I would be lead to another page that answered my question. This continued for about 5 straight hours.

I then noticed the time, and realized the person I lived with was going to be home from a Halloween party soon. It was around 2am, I scrambled to get the tools needed for dedication. I happened to have 3 red candles, so I lit those and did the dedication. As soon as the paper with my signature in blood lit on fire to burn, I felt an immense weight off my shoulders. Like I had been carrying a solid ton of negativity or something, and it was all lifted. Intense peace and calmness, and a feeling of belonging.

Over the next bunch of months, I spent hours every day reading the website. I didn’t bother to look into the yahoo groups until I was around 4-6 months in. I just wanted to learn everything on the website. I also created an astral temple, a really awesome looking one. If I could, I would draw it for you all to see. I still occasionally pop in and am reminded of the time I took to make it. The day I created it, when I finished, I saw Satan in there. I could only see his head and face and only for a moment, but it was a beautiful moment and made me feel like I actually mattered to him in some way.


Finding My Guardian

I had read a method of finding one’s guardian, to simply relax and ask yourself who it might be, and then be lead to him/her.

I was visiting an elderly and sick relative, who had to go lie down for a short while during our visit, the usual routine we had. I sat on the couch by myself, went into a light trance, and asked myself who it could be. I then saw in my mind, a planet, Saturn. I walked to my astral temple, outside of it, where I had flowers along the nice pathway. I suddenly smelled flowers. I asked myself what flower it was, and the word “hyacinth” popped into my head. I had no idea what those flowers smelled like or even looked like, never even saw them in real life before.

So when I went home, I looked through the lists of Demons who matched both Saturn as their planet, and hyacinth as their plant. Lord Set was the only one. His color is red, which was my favorite as a child. I of course had doubts that he really was my guardian, as he is one of Satan’s sons and therefore high ranking and I was just a nobody. But then his name kept “coincidentally” coming up, both in my head and also in real life. I watched a TV show with a friend later that day (or maybe the next day, but no later than that), and there was a Demon named Set in that episode. It was probably in a blasphemous manner, but all the same, it was his name.

There were a few other signs, they were each once per day, but I forget the other signs (I’ll edit this if I remember). As well, Set’s name kept ringing in my head for weeks. I finally gave up doubting, and accepted that he was my Guardian.

Lord Set was my Guardian for the first 6 years of my dedication, and we had known each other in at least one of my past lives as well. On that anniversary, he told me I was going to have a new guardian, as he was going to be too busy for the next while. I also got the impression that I didn’t need one as much as I did back then. So even though he is no longer my Guardian, I have endless love, respect, and appreciation for him, always.


My First Group Ritual

Back in those days, RTR’s were not out yet. We did monthly rituals timed with the phase and sign of the Moon: a destruction ritual to destroy the enemy programs, and an awakening ritual to bring people to Satan.

After my months of reading the JoS, I finally decided to have a peek at the yahoo groups (this was before the forum existed). I noticed that there was only just over 3,000 members in the main group. There was a group ritual posted, by a HPS Zildar. It was for that day, or perhaps the next day, I can’t remember exactly. But I eagerly prepared for it, and did the ritual to the best of my ability. It was just a prayer, and vibrating a few runes 8 times each. She also included a way to clean the aura and chakras, the “table-top method”, of scanning light down the body and pushing out any negative energy, so I did that right after finishing the ritual.

The very exact moment I finished, my phone rang. It was the local pizza company, offering me a discount on my next order. I thanked them, hung up, and then realized this must have been some sort of gift from Satan, showing me that I was on the right path in participating in the group rituals. The timing was way too coincidental, them calling the exact moment I finished. Not during the ritual, or an hour later, but exactly when I finished.


Over The Years

A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating. I have meditated in public bathrooms, park benches, on a bus… whatever it takes. I have also never lost faith in Satan. I have definitely doubted myself and if I was important or insignificant to him or anything, but I never gave up believing in Him and trying to advance myself under His guidance and will. That’s actually an affirmation I used to use daily, something about continuously advancing under Satan’s guidance and will, I can’t remember it fully now though.

I would also like to take the time to publicly thank a few other Gods and Goddesses who have helped me over the years. Osiris, for encouragement with yoga, leading me to new resources and encouraging me to challenge myself to learn more advanced asanas, and to re-learn some basics but at a deeper level. Erishkegal, for helping me with a Neptune transit. I never summoned them, they each came to me on their own accord. Erishkegal came to me when I was doing laundry one day, her energy feels so grounded and solid but also a bit fiery, perfect for dealing with Neptune. Maat, Furcas, Bifrons, Barbatos, Valefor, and a few others have also been of great help, in overall advancement but also in showing me how wonderful Satanism is, and how much better things can get. Opportunities that only dedicated Satanists are privileged to. Amon Ra for fixing something in my soul, also never summoned him, he came while I was just looking at his sigil one day. Inanna, Lilith. And others.

I have seen SS here who refuse to get in touch with the Demons, wanting to do things themselves. With all due respect, this is like the typical 2 year old who wants to be independent and do things, but they either make a mess, or break something. Satan and his Demons know us better than we know ourselves: they know our past, our fate, our karma, and our future. They want to help us, they want us to advance, evolve, overcome obstacles and issues, and perfect ourselves. Don’t ignore them. With some of the things I have been helped with, I had no idea there even was a problem. Like Amon Ra who randomly came to me and attuned something in my soul. I have always remained open to guidance from Satan and his Demons.

If you feel the need for guidance, but are unsure of what exactly, or maybe you just want to feel closer to Satan and the Demons, one idea is to have a look at our SS Calendar and see whose week it is. Meditate on their sigil, read their description on the JoS. One visualization exercise I do is seeing their sigil in my mind but in their candle color, and with their plants or anything next to it, and even incorporate their element if possible. Sort of like a fancy 3D portrait, the better your visualization and imagination, the better the portrait. And do this every 5 or so days for each one, through the year. At least 10 Demons have come to me from me just doing this exercise, or they at least quickly sent me a small piece of advice.


Wondering what to do for Halloween? You can read, or re-read, the JoS. I will also go looking for a pumpkin to carve, and then hold a thanksgiving ritual. Plus do the F-RTR, obviously. What are your plans? :)

Happy Halloween!
-Lydia

That's Beautiful Lydia. XD

Happy 10 year Anniversary.

End of 2010, early 2011 was such a special time. I hold memories of that time in fondness too.
 
I've been on the same boat as some members in not summoning much or at all. I'll admit back in 2003/2004 I did summon one or two demons particularly for astral projection. But never felt like doing it again. It wasn't to my liking. I wouldn't know what to return in favor for their actions. I know spiritual warfare or an energy ball. But I really don't know what to give back. I usually summon, spend a few minutes talking thank them, and hope for the best.

I want to ask as a side topic how many minutes should we be stating, vibrating, chanting, or mentally calling out the Demon? Like a minute - 5 minutes what's the appropriate way to summon them. Not that I'm asking "How" just "What is it people do to get an audience with a Demon".

I've spent anywhere from a minute to 5 minutes reciting but I guess nothing happens or something. I'm not trying to be doubtful especially after burning myself out with meditation and RTRs but I really could not state if I have summoned a Demon or not. It's like Standard Ritual, for some reason I've been doing it these past 4 days to have an audience with the big crown 4. But I'm not sure if my message is being heard or if things are occurring.

Also is there such a thing as even though I've been dedicated for a long time. To feel bad summoning Demons, I hate asking for help. It's like my days back in public school I never asked for help never bothered with it. Even had teachers wanting to know why I don't ask for help. I wish to do it all myself but seems like I do need help perhaps even more help than I can possibly imagine or experience on my own.

So what if you have summoned Demons but wish to experience something but don't know how to look for signs or take advantage of signs.
 
Cool to hear but its very unusual I think to go into this thinking you want to dedicate to Satan but not knowing a lot about this. That kind of makes you special in my mind. I read the Satanic Bible all the way through a long time ago and I dont remember anything in there on this but interesting. To me if I didn't know any better from reading the JOS I would think Levey was an Athiest who just liked to do some sort of theatrical thing (which is cool i love creativity and things like that but take all the enemy crap out of it like the keys praising angels and xtian God and Hebrew names and letters etc)

I do not know what day I dedicated but I too have a day i celebrate being here. I chose July 21st because it was the day I came back to Satanism after being lost to the enemy for a couple years. On the day the final rtr was posted about two hours before that I came back. I honestly had thought the Gods had abandoned me forever so I saw that as a special sign.

My girl actually plans to dedicate on Halloween. If she goes through with it. The wording in the dedication is the issue here. I do think she believes me now that this religion has nothing to do with xtianity though or being on the evil side of things or any of that crap.

She did the final rtr a couple days ago said it felt good. Didn't tell her to do that but i told her not to again until she does the dedication. Suprised the enemy never really did attack after that. Guess they were busy with something else. She liked it a lot.

So i am glad she decided to follow the truth now but I still think July 21st may be our day to celebrate this cause the energy is positive that day for gentiles usually this is during the Jewish month of AV which is somehow bad for them dont understand it but i do notice the energy is good for making positive changes in life.

We probably should do something on Halloween to the election in the USA but I dont know if we will nothing posted yet. I love doing these group rituals cause I get bored with just the final rtr all the time and following a schedule feels good to me as a person with a strong Saturn and 10th house.

But nice story. I enjoyed reading it.
 
Lydia said:
Wondering what to do for Halloween? You can read, or re-read, the JoS. I will also go looking for a pumpkin to carve, and then hold a thanksgiving ritual. Plus do the F-RTR, obviously. What are your plans? :)

Happy Halloween!
-Lydia

I'm going to do some themed drawings. And I will consecrate my black mirror, if the sky is clear.

Happy Halloween to you too and Happy Anniversary!
 
I found first time Joy of Satan year ago about september-october I love autumn and winter and Halloween and Yule is best time when new people can find Satanism.
Year ago I was so stupit I thought that satanists are mad Antifa members who make abortion rituals, and then I seached on internet does exist nationalist-satanism, and then I found Joy of Satan. Every time when I thought about Baphomet picture on dark autumn nights, and then I felt that
I have irresistible desire to became satanist and satanism is not so bad as christian cuckservatives talk. And this is so wonderful how my guardian demon Anubis give me ankh, I found ankh in my countriside home and I do not know how it came here.

Happy Halloween!

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And "It is okay to be white" campaign on Halloween!

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Beautiful story, I also started as SS this month when there were 2 weeks left for Halloween 9 years ago, in my case for several years I was attracted to the theory of the extraterrestrial gods and by chance I found on the internet a forum called "unidos por Satan" in Spanish and from that website I found the JOS.
 
Lydia said:
The Beginning
-Lydia

Happy Halloween and 10th anniversary Lydia! have a good one. This post was very inspiring and brought me to reflect as well :)

Astonishingly there are somethings we have in common in regards to how we found the JoS.

Became friends, sorta, with someone I didn't know was a Laveyan Satanist at the time when our teacher gave us a group assignment and we were the only ones left without a partner so we pretty much had to. The relationship started out quite rough but eventually found that we had some things in common and she gave me quite a lot of encouragement and motivation on things that I lacked such as confidence, initiative etc... was the nicest one in the class honestly.

Never got in touch after that year ended though, and how I found out she was a Laveyan Satanist was when I brought her up in a conversation with a friend who said that a long time ago she decided to reveal her faith in his class which caused her to be harassed/bullied quite a lot unfortunately, then my friend began his trash talk about her afterwards because of her belief and it upset me a lot. That day really changed my whole perspective on Satanists and what I've been led to believe and this was the beginning of strange spiritual events negative and positive leading me to consider the reality of occult/paranormal phenomena, the starting of a story I mentioned elsewhere. It's funny though because the Satanist hating friend was someone I considered a miracle friend that I've no idea how I would've survived high school without as he always had my back and was supportive like the Satanist, you could say meeting those two were destined.

Then I was looking up "Selling your soul to Satan" out of curiosity and was interested in the stories, found a bunch of B.S here and there but I found this question someone was asking on yahoo answers and someone replied "We don't sell our souls, we dedicate it", then posted a link to the JoS and I gave it a read, there was also for a time the google search listing the Joyofsatan page first so I'm not sure what came first, but I disregarded the site for a long while though because of lingering fear and uncertainty until I was content that I wanted to be a Satanist a year later and remembered about the site. Spent half the year reading it before joining the yahoo groups.

That person may have been the biggest factor for me considering Satanism opening a lot of events that eventually led me here, still trying to find out who was the one that linked the JoS dedication page on yahoo answers to thank them tremendously and this proves you shouldn't underestimate the impact of efforts online.
 
Much Joy for your SS Decade Anniversary sis :)

Nothing too out of the casual planned for this Halloween, maybe between one RTR countdown and another watch some witchcraft themed film.
 
Big Dipper said:
Lydia said:
The Beginning
A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating.
-Lydia
Do you qualify for hps lol? This was very interesting to read and very weird to think that 10 years ago you were all doing this important stuff and i remember exactly what i was doing 10 years ago: playing castle miner z on the xbox360 as a little young munchkin. I never really wanted to contact any of the gods for multiple reason (my people skills being one of them), but its so funny how they just show up to help without any warning; That scares me. I feel like one day years from now that will happen and i wont have a shirt on, or socks, or something.

I really don't think the Gods care that much about this. If there going to come to people they have probably been around just about anything and seen it. They look past kind of petty things if they want to interact with you for some reason they will regardless of how they are dressed at the time or what they are doing.

I do think though they respect privacy for more private things (think you know what i mean having sex using restroom etc) and will wait till your done to come to you.

Really you should not be overly worried about human social skills with the Gods as their way of doing things is different plus they see into your heart so they would know how to interact with you.

So dont be fearful you should give it a shot getting to know the Gods.
 
Congratulations Lidya Happy Halloween
and thank you very much for the information :)

HAIL SATAN !!!!!!!
 
Thanks for sharing your story!!

I'm surprised with how quickly you dedicated. Took me YEARS of being curious and was VERY skeptical about Satanism. It wasn't until November, close to thanksgiving last year, that I did the formal dedication ritual. A lot of significant progress since then.

I've found that Satanism holds its ground even when faced with the scientific method.

Happy Samhain!!
 
Greetings!

That is a very epic story! I am amazed at how long you've actually been with us, Lydia.
It is great to have you with us!!

My plans were before to watch some "scary" movies about aliens and such, frankly speaking been doing that lately and let me tell you that viewing it with SS perspective you notice quite a lot of things a "normal" Joe would miss.

But as of right now, I am not too sure.
Do you think doing a Race Awakening Ritual on Halloween be a good idea to do?
I've read somewhere a while ago that you do that ritual every Full Moon and seeing as how there will be a full moon on Halloween, I thought to ask if you will do it again.

I hope everyone has a good time both in meditation and kicking the enemy ass, haha.

Hail Father Satan! Hail Mother Lilith!!!
 
Lydia said:
[
A few things I am proud of: I have never skipped a single day of meditation. This marks an entire decade of never having gone more that 24 hours without meditating. I have meditated in public bathrooms, park benches, on a bus… whatever it takes. I have also never lost faith in Satan.
-Lydia
Thank you for sharing this,it is really inspiring to see a spiritual Satanist having so much determination as you!!
 
Amazing and congratulations on 10 years Lydia. one of the best and finest people i have met through here.

Good Luck onwards too.
 
Congratz, that's a good story to make others like me to keep going forward, when this year end it will be like 6 years (i think) since i dedicated my self, i still remember how i found JOS too sundently like i just wrote something about magick and it just popped up and clicked but never found it again with the same thing in search it was just suddently and i fell in love with all in there like i searched all my life, the dedication ritual was a bit of a mess i was an early teen and nearly burned my house (like i droped the flaming paper on the floor near a cabinet,i was scared how fast it burnt but it didn't leaved even a sign) and then i was extremly sad (i thought i fucked it up) but i felt a weird ''radiation'' magnetic calm palm calming me and then i felt changed in a good way, sadly i always was pressured that i wasn't accepted even if my first meditation felt so strong thus ''leaving'' (like not leave but when you're still skeptic and just forgot, i dont know how to explain) satanism for like 4 years, nearly all of my time from the first time i was dedicated until now, i came back when i saw that the hate of the jews is skyrocketing back in 2018-2019 so my interest for satanism suddently grew again because i told my self ''hey these guys actually predicted what would happen''. It's quite hard to be serious in meditation when your house is small and never have silence because of the TV but soon i will move out to a bigger house and finally can start a proper way in satanism.

Yeah i just felt to share a short version of my story because i fell shame of what i did and how i lost time, it calms writing it here.
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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