AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
Post: Hello spiritual Satanist,
First of all, I'd like to thank you for providing the oppurtunity to ask questions easily and anonymously. The introduction to my question is a bit long, but might be useful for answering the questions below.
I was born in Somalia and adopted by my Belgian father and mother. So I grew up in the Belgium. I started to struggle with depression and anxiety around age 16. At a certain moment, I decided to start to meditate and read more on spirituality. Someone whom I watched very much is Teal Swan. I think she can be considered a New Age-teacher. I still think a lot of her ideas are truthful.
My depression got significantly worse I did something (I deemed to be) very bad and I was not able to talk to anyone about it. I had no friends. After that traumatic event, I felt I had betrayed 'God'. By that I mean the (sentient?) source of my general sense of peace and 'enlightenment' (I don't know how I could describe it otherwise). I felt I had violated my principles and somehow committed an 'unforgivable sin'. About 2 years later, I was approached on the street by an evangelist. I knew about Jesus, but had never believed in Him. As I was clueless, and wanted to regain that deep sense of connection to (a) God, I accepted his invitation for the sunday service. There I accepted Jesus and became a Christian. I thought that this might help me. The people there were very nice and for the first time in a long while, I felt I had friends. However, this fear of having committed the 'unforgivable sin' kept lingering underneath the surface. At a certain point, I decided to look for atheist stances and found Dan Barker: a former Evangelical pastor turned atheist. This actually gave me some relieve. The 'unforgivable sin' might not even exist.
At some point, I stumbled upon the JoS. First, I felt recitent to read it as I did not want to go to (the Christian) hell. I slowly did do it anyway. 'God will lead me to the Truth, if he forgives me'. The main reason for reading the JoS is that I recognized a lot of it from the period in which I was more into New Age. I felt that it had or at least could have truth to it. Especially the blog posts by HP Cobra are written very well.
I told Satan several times that if he is in fact the true God, I would dedicate to him. I also humbly asked if He could show himself to me so that I knew he exists. This has not yet happened. At least not in a very clear way.
Questions:
- Is it appropriate to expect Satan or his Demons to show themselves to you?
- As mentioned, I am of African descent. Now, I know from the JoS and the forum that many rituals are race specific and that Satan himself looks caucasian. Do you think that the Gods would like to work with me even though I am black?
Hopefully you could answer these questions.
First of all, I'd like to thank you for providing the oppurtunity to ask questions easily and anonymously. The introduction to my question is a bit long, but might be useful for answering the questions below.
I was born in Somalia and adopted by my Belgian father and mother. So I grew up in the Belgium. I started to struggle with depression and anxiety around age 16. At a certain moment, I decided to start to meditate and read more on spirituality. Someone whom I watched very much is Teal Swan. I think she can be considered a New Age-teacher. I still think a lot of her ideas are truthful.
My depression got significantly worse I did something (I deemed to be) very bad and I was not able to talk to anyone about it. I had no friends. After that traumatic event, I felt I had betrayed 'God'. By that I mean the (sentient?) source of my general sense of peace and 'enlightenment' (I don't know how I could describe it otherwise). I felt I had violated my principles and somehow committed an 'unforgivable sin'. About 2 years later, I was approached on the street by an evangelist. I knew about Jesus, but had never believed in Him. As I was clueless, and wanted to regain that deep sense of connection to (a) God, I accepted his invitation for the sunday service. There I accepted Jesus and became a Christian. I thought that this might help me. The people there were very nice and for the first time in a long while, I felt I had friends. However, this fear of having committed the 'unforgivable sin' kept lingering underneath the surface. At a certain point, I decided to look for atheist stances and found Dan Barker: a former Evangelical pastor turned atheist. This actually gave me some relieve. The 'unforgivable sin' might not even exist.
At some point, I stumbled upon the JoS. First, I felt recitent to read it as I did not want to go to (the Christian) hell. I slowly did do it anyway. 'God will lead me to the Truth, if he forgives me'. The main reason for reading the JoS is that I recognized a lot of it from the period in which I was more into New Age. I felt that it had or at least could have truth to it. Especially the blog posts by HP Cobra are written very well.
I told Satan several times that if he is in fact the true God, I would dedicate to him. I also humbly asked if He could show himself to me so that I knew he exists. This has not yet happened. At least not in a very clear way.
Questions:
- Is it appropriate to expect Satan or his Demons to show themselves to you?
- As mentioned, I am of African descent. Now, I know from the JoS and the forum that many rituals are race specific and that Satan himself looks caucasian. Do you think that the Gods would like to work with me even though I am black?
Hopefully you could answer these questions.
